Dating Advice – The Date Mix https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix Dating and Relationship Advice for Today's Daters Wed, 21 Feb 2018 19:48:03 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.5 Infatuation Symptoms: What Happens When You’ve Really Got It Bad https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/dating-advice/infatuation-symptoms/ Wed, 21 Feb 2018 09:00:58 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16083 This is your brain on love.

The post Infatuation Symptoms: What Happens When You’ve Really Got It Bad appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Nearly everyone has experienced the bliss of new love. Infatuation symptoms are not difficult to recognize or understand—constant preoccupation with someone, day-dreaming, butterflies when you’re planning on seeing them, smiling like an idiot, gushing to your friends constantly, or turning any benign conversation about a deal on avocados into an excuse to discuss their glittering eyes. But infatuation causes actual chemical effects in the body that can lead to physical symptoms that you may not necessarily equate with the joyfulness of being in love.

According to the Harvard Department of Neurobiology, new love increases levels of dopamine in the brain, but those heightened levels of dopamine also signal and increase in cortisol—the “crisis handling” chemical, and norepinephrine, an adrenaline hormone that can cause insomnia, cravings, and loss of appetite Basically, infatuation can completely scramble your brain.

Here are a few infatuation symptoms you may encounter when you’re really interested in someone:

1. Flaw-Blindness
Raging dopamine levels do all kinds of things to your brain and body, and one of them is majorly clouding your judgment. Yes, your new boo is probably absolutely wonderful, but the chance that their completely and utterly perfect is pretty slim. If the way they smack their lips when they eat ribs is just freakin’ adorable now, give it time to simmer before you declare it’s your favorite thing about them.

2. Forgetfulness
In crisis mode, your brain narrows its scope down to a singular focus—what’s essentially tunnel vision. That means that when you’re preoccupied with a new special someone, your brain may be dropping off its list all the other things that aren’t “important.” If you’re driving home with every intention of stopping at the bank, you may find yourself in your driveway before you even realize you’ve forgotten.

 3. Sour Stomach
When the stakes are high, your anxiety levels naturally heighten, and that can drop your desire to eat. If you’ve been on cloud nine lately and you’re finding that your stomach isn’t cooperating, this may be the reason why.

 4. Insecurity
Cortisol can caused heightened anxiety, and when you’re focusing on impressing someone new (and worrying about whether or not they’re as into you as you’re into them) this can cause you to turn your anxieties inward, and focus on your imperfections. Suddenly, you may find that you can’t let go of the size of your calves, or you’re fretting about if you’re savings account is too small. Things that you normally take in stride may become incredibly bothersome.

5. Exhaustion
Your preoccupation may hit whole new levels if it’s disrupting your sleep patterns. You can lie awake for hours thinking of all the wonderful things about your new crush, fretting over all the things that could go wrong, waking up early to do some extra primping in case you run into them, work out a little harder and cut back on calories to look your best, and not to mention panic sweat when they even look in your direction. These heightened activities can really take a toll on the body.

When you consider the havoc being newly in love wreaks on your body and mind, it can be daunting, and frankly, a turn off. But here’s the best part: You’re so in love, you don’t usually care. None of these symptoms even compare to when that dream person looks into your eyes. So keep sailing on that sea of love, dear friends. Soon the newness will wane and you’ll be left with the long lasting comfort of being able to sleep, eat, see, and remember things again.

The post Infatuation Symptoms: What Happens When You’ve Really Got It Bad appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Older Men Dating Younger Women: What Online Dating Data Tells Us https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/dating-advice/older-men-dating-younger-women/ Wed, 21 Feb 2018 09:00:32 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16048 As our ideas about male and female relationships evolve, can we see it reflected in online dating behaviors?

The post Older Men Dating Younger Women: What Online Dating Data Tells Us appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
The phenomenon of older men dating younger women is nothing new. According to a 2014 Current Population Survey, the average age difference in heterosexual couples is 2.3 years, with the man being older than the woman. But recent data has shown that as our ideas about men, women, and relationships evolve daters’ views on age are changing as well.

The online dating site and app Zoosk found that in 2017, online daters were 9% more likely to like, message, or have a conversation with someone who was ten years older or younger than them than they were in 2016. That’s a pretty big age difference when you think about it. And a big change to see in attitudes in just one year.

To learn more about how age effects attraction, they took a deeper dive into the data from their over 40 million members to see what other trends they could find. As it turns out, even though overall attitudes about age are shifting somewhat,  traditional gender dynamics of older men dating younger women and vise versa still dominated the dating scene.

Here are a few interesting takeaways:

60% of men are attracted to younger women. 
And of that 60%, the vast majority (51%) like women who are 1 to 4 years younger than them, 27% like women who are 5 to 9 years younger than them, and 22% like women who are more than 10 years younger than them. That means 13% of all men dating online are looking for women who are more than 10 years younger than they are.

27% of men are attracted to older women.
However, unlike men who are attracted to younger women, men who show interest in older women don’t stray too far outside their age range. All of the men in that 27% prefer to date women who are only 1 to 4 years older.

13% of men prefer women their same age.
Give or take a few months, a large number of men show attraction towards women who are their same age.

It’s not just the guys who are conforming to social norms.
When looking into women’s behavior on the site, the numbers of women who like older men almost mirrored that of men who like  younger women. 56% of younger women prefer dating older men. And of that 56%, the majority (56%) like men who are 1 to 4 years older than them. 30% like men who are 5 to 9 years older than them, and 14% like men who are more than 10 years older than them.

Typically, men match with women between 1 to 3 years younger.
Though men are often attracted to women up to 10 years younger than them, the women they match with (AKA, the women who like them back) tend to be only 1 to 3 years younger.

The older men get, the younger the women they match with are.
It could be that differences in age matter less as we get older, but the older men get the younger the women they match with are. Men in their 20s tend to match with women almost their same age while men in their 50s usually match with women who are three years younger. In addition, you can see the numbers increase as men get older.

Ages of Women Men Match With While Online Dating

  • Men in their 50s typically match with women who are 3 years younger.
  • Men in their 40s typically match with women who are 2 years years younger.
  • Men in their 30s typically match with women who are 1.5 years younger.
  • Men in their 20s typically match with women who are half a year younger.

When it comes to messaging, men who like older woman have a slight advantage. 
Men who message older women are more likely to get a response than those who message younger woman, but it’s only a slight 2% increase. Men who message women their own age also see a 2% increase in their replies.

And men who message women 10+ years younger have a slight disadvantage.
In general, men who message women younger than them have an average reply rate. However, men who message women who are 10+ years younger have a reply rate that’s 3% below the average.

So what do we do with all this information? (Other than think to ourselves, Huh, that’s interesting.) Well, for starters, just keep it in mind. There are a lot of reasons why men typically like dating younger women, and maybe you’re one of those men.  That’s great. And maybe you’re not. That’s great too. Being aware of who you’re attracted to and why can help you find the person who’s right for you.

However, if you notice that you’re attracted to a certain age-group and it hasn’t been working out for you, think about that older or younger person you may not have considered before. It may be time to mix it up a bit and see if something, and someone, new will work out for you.

The post Older Men Dating Younger Women: What Online Dating Data Tells Us appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
How to Talk to Men Online https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/online-dating-advice/online-dating-first-message/how-to-talk-to-men-online/ Mon, 19 Feb 2018 09:00:53 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16067 A few tips to get him talking.

The post How to Talk to Men Online appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Generally, women have an advantage over men while online dating. Especially when it comes to taking the initiative and making the first move. When single women send the initial message to start a conversation on a dating app, they are four times more likely to get a response than men are. But don’t let that go to your head — getting a response from a guy you’re really interested in can still be tough. And when you’re staring at that blank text space where your amazing message should be, it’s not always easy to know what to say.

A girl can drive herself crazy continually checking her dating profile and waiting for a notification. It’s like the new waiting by the phone, and it can make you start to doubt every word in every message you send. Was saying “hi” too generic? Was asking about his dog too personal? Was the message too short? Was it too long? Maybe he’s just not that into you — but why not?

If you’re wondering how to talk to men online, here are a few handy tips.

1. Pick the right dating app or site.
First of all, you have to make sure you’re in the right place to find romance. Some niche sites have relatively few dating prospects in your area, so the silence may not be your fault — it might be because the dating profiles you’re messaging are inactive. That’s a bummer, but it’s easily remedied. Just sign up for a dating platform with a large and active membership base. Do your homework by looking at customer ratings and reading expert reviews of popular dating apps, so you can join a legit dating platform where guys will be happy to meet you.

2. Be authentic, upbeat, and interesting.
Everyone has a story to tell. Your life history, your opinions, your personality all make you you, and that’s something worth sharing with a date. You don’t have to write an autobiography on your profile or in your messages, but definitely reference the best bits. If you’ve been out of the country on a  trip or for study abroad, mention that in passing. If you have a particular talent, bring it up in conversation as seamlessly as you can. You want him asking follow-up questions and wondering what else you have going on.

Guys often like to pursue, so you probably won’t have to work too hard to get his attention. Just make sure you have interesting things to say once you’ve got it. As Heath Ledger said in “Casanova”—be the flame, not the moth.

3. Keep it light.
This is a good tip for guys and gals longing for long-term love. Don’t bring up commitment too early in the conversation. Even if you hear wedding bells ringing in your head, play it cool or he’ll have warning alarms ringing in his. It reeks of desperation to talk about meeting parents, going on trips together, or otherwise riding off into the sunset when you’ve just met someone online. Let all that unfold naturally. The time to talk about your relationship is after two or three great dates—it isn’t after two or three messages on a dating app or website.

4. Ask questions that get him talking.
This tip is pretty straightforward, but it’s worth noting. If you want to get a guy to talk to you, give him something to say. Ask questions about his life, hobbies, aspirations, and opinions. If you can pull something specific from his dating profile—“I see you like Marvel comics, what did you think of the latest movie?”—all the better!

If his profile doesn’t have many personal details, you can ask general conversation starters to get the ball rolling. This’ll help you get to know each other and find common ground. Try to strike a good conversational balance between the two of you. I’d recommend ending every message with at least one question; that way, you hold up your end of the conversation while giving him things to say back.

5. Stay positive.
Look, we all feel frustrated, impatient, cynical, and down every once in a while, but unfortunately that black mood isn’t going to make dates line up at your door. People want to be around people who make them feel good. A little sarcasm and dark humor is fine. A consistently negative attitude is not. Instead of complaining about the dating scene, the weather, your job, your family, or other parts of life, focus on the positive things—your passions, your hopes, your bffs—so your date will see your best and most attractive side.

In the dating world, the getting-to-know-you phase is about making your date smile and feel good about themselves. Those happy feelings are going to make them want to talk to you more and more frequently.

You don’t have to act like Pollyanna or look like Margot Robbie to attract date prospects online—just be yourself and keep these tips in mind. If you approach online dating with a light-hearted attitude, you’re bound to start building connections and having fun while you’re at it. Of course, getting a guy to talk to you isn’t always as simple as typing “Hi” and pressing send. Sometimes you need to catch your crush’s eye by asking good questions, telling interesting stories, and being friendly and flirty in every message.

 

Amber Brooks is a Contributing Editor at DatingAdvice.com. When she was growing up, her family teased her for being “boy crazy,” but she preferred to think of herself as a budding dating expert. As an English major in college, Amber honed her communication skills to write clearly, knowledgeably, and passionately about topics that interest her. Now with a background in writing, Amber brings her tireless wit and relatable experiences to DatingAdvice.com.

The post How to Talk to Men Online appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Dating in College: Starting Your Freshman Year https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/dating-advice/dating-in-college-freshman/ Sat, 17 Feb 2018 09:00:21 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16052 Are you ready for the college dating scene? Here's what you should know.

The post Dating in College: Starting Your Freshman Year appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Dating has changed a lot over the yearswhat used to be an experience filled with courtship rituals, well-defined roles, and a set of unstated rules that (for the most part) people agreed with has been replaced with the wild world of dating apps where just about anything goes. (And it often goes to some interesting places.) But it’s not just a change in technology, dating has gone through a generational shift as well.

Dating in college used to look very differentwomen attended a university expecting to graduate with a MRS degree, and likewise men went expecting to find a wife. Now the vast majority of women go to college for the same reasons as mento get an education to help advance their careers. And contrary to what older generations may have thought, graduating from college as a single man or woman isn’t the end of the world anymore. In fact, it’s just the beginning.

College was and still is a time for exploration. In addition to academics, you learn more about  yourself, how to be independent, and how to interact with the world. Your relationships are a huge part of that. And how to form them, mold them, maintain them, and even end them is a huge part of your college experience.

I went to a traditional four-year college. During my time there, my views on dating and relationships changed as I progressed through each year of school, freshman to senior year. To give you an idea of what dating in college is like and help you master the art of navigating the somewhat muddy and confused waters of the college dating experience, I’ve put together this helpful guide. This four-part series will cover the dating trends you’ll experience during each year of college, the different things you and your friends will go through, what you can expect, and some tips on how to make your way.

In this article, I’ll be discussing the beginning of your freshman year, what for many is the single best year of their life and for others is the single most terrifying year of their life. (And for others is both terrifying and amazing at the same time.) 

 

The Three Types of Daters You’ll Meet Freshman Year

You did it. Good for you. You made it through those four long years of high school. You pack up your bags and get dropped off at your new home. You’re free. You can do whatever you want. Be whoever you want. You don’t have to report back to your parents every time you head out of the house. You did it.

But with all this freedom comes great responsibility. You don’t have mom or dad there to help guide the way. You’re on your own, and it’s time to make friends and meet new people. And let’s admit it, you’re going to be meeting a ton of new people.

The interesting thing is, when it comes to dating and relationships, many of the new people you’ll meet will fit into one of these categories…

1. LTR-ers
About 10% of people you encounter in college will be in the Long-Term Relationship (LTR) category. These are people who go to college while in a LTR/LDR (Long Distance Relationship) with their high school sweetheart. Now there’s nothing wrong with this. Actually, you know what, I’m just going to say it, there is. Don’t do it. You’re going to meet so many different and interesting people in college and you don’t want to miss out on someone who could be really amazing for you, or someone who (at the very least) you can learn a lot from because you’re trying to make it work with someone who lives far away. Wouldn’t you rather be going out on a Friday night instead of sitting inside your dorm FaceTiming someone?

I know when you’re in the middle of a relationship it can feel like it’s going to be forever, but the reality is that it probably won’t be. Both you and the person you’re dating are going to change a lot in the next four years and even though some high-school sweethearts grow closer together, the majority grow apart. And that’s not a bad thing, it’s just a life thing that happens. If you’re in an LTR think about why you’re with this person. Is it just because they feel safe or that this relationship is what you’ve always known? Because now is the time to venture into the unknown a bit.

2. The Relationship Romanticizers
These people are the worst. About 25% of people you’ll meet freshman year will fall into this category. These people are obsessed with finding a boyfriend or girlfriend, so much so that it literally takes over their lives. Admittedly,  I was that girl for a split second during my first year. But as it turns out, not seriously dating anyone during my freshman year was the best decision I ever made. If you go to a frat party set on finding your husband, well guess what, you’re in for a world of disappointment. Finding the love of your life will happen when you least expect it, so try not to force it. If you’re approaching your college dating experience with the mindset that you have to be in a relationship, or that you can’t be alone, you’re going about it all wrong. Meeting someone and starting a serious relationship can obviously be a great experience, but you shouldn’t force something because it feels like you should be in a relationship. Relationships are really only fun if you genuinely care about the person. Serial monogamy during your first year of college is only going to make you regret you didn’t take advantage of this time. Trust me, enjoy the freedom while it lasts.

3. SingleAF
Ah, yes. The third and final category of people you’ll meet during your freshman year of college. I’m biased, but this category is my favorite. The people who are single and don’t care about dating are seriously the best. They’re in college to live their best life and have fun while doing it. The final 65% of people you meet will fall into this category. It’s because they’re always down to do something. They’re down for the adventure. There’s nothing holding them back. They’re not obsessed with finding ‘the one’ and because of this they meet a lot of people and form a lot of different relationshipssome romantic, some sexual, some friends that will last a lifetime, and some (ok, a lot) that are somewhere in between. Not all of these relationships are even good, some may even be bad or be huge mistakes. The point is that when you’re SingleAF, you’re also free AF and open to experiencing and learning from everything your college life has to offer. If you aren’t one of these people, then align yourself with one. If you are one of these people, get ready for a fun time.

Being unattached during my freshman year was the best decision I ever made. During my single years, I was able to learn a lot about myself. These aren’t things I could have learned if I was tied down or if I was constantly obsessed with trying to get a guy’s attention or chase after a relationship. Some of my key takeaways include:

  • I figured out who I was and who I wanted to be.
  • I learned more about who I was attracted to and who was a good person for me to be in a relationship with.
  • I had a lot of fun. No reporting back to anyone, no making compromises, or having to set aside time for someone. I did what I wanted, when I wanted to.

By not tying myself down I was able to learn a lot about myself. I learned about what I liked. What kind of guys I was attracted to. How to craft the perfect booty-call message. (Just kidding… Ok, not really.) By being single and embracing it, I learned so much more about myself in one year than I had all the years prior. I had fun. I shed tears. I broke hearts and had my heart broken. I gained a ton of experience that I wouldn’t have otherwise.

Discovering What You Want 

Now I’m not saying being single was always a blast, or that it’s the only way to experience your freshman year. Relationships are great because you have someone that will always be there for you, and you’re there for them. It’s nice to have someone to snuggle with, who cares about how you did on your Shakespeare paper, or who waits for you after class and walks you back to the dorms. There are a lot of great things about being in a relationship. And ya, I was experiencing a lot by being single and learning a lot about myself, but there’s a lot to experience and learn about yourself while you’re in a relationship with someone too. In many ways, learning how to be with someone is just as important as learning how to be alone.

I know the SingleAF life isn’t for everyone, and I’m not saying that people in relationships aren’t independent or don’t have fun. Obviously, you can regret not being with someone just as much as you can regret being with someone. I’m not saying you should walk away from someone amazing to experience the so-called ‘single life’ of going out every night and flirting/hooking up with as many people as you can. Being single, or SingleAF, isn’t about sleeping around. (It can be, if that’s what you want, but that’s not all it is.)

Some people go to college thinking that going to a lot of parties and having booty calls is the only way to have fun or the only way to enjoy being single. Like it’s just ‘what you do’ the same way people used to say going to college to find a husband was just ‘what you do’. It’s what I did and I had a blast, but I wish more people would approach college as an opportunity to figure out what you want to do. Not what your parents want, your high school boyfriend or girlfriend wants, your old friends or your new friends want, what you think you’re supposed to want, or what you feel like you should want… What you actually want to do. What you want to get out of this experience and this time. Because here’s the thing…  it’s your time.

Four years seems like a lot when you start college but it goes by fast. You are in the middle of a rare moment of your life where you can be totally and completely focused on yourself. When it comes to dating and relationships, it can be easy to get lost in another person or in the experience of dating itself. (And, hey, that’s even part of the fun.) But as you enter your freshman year and begin to meet people, go to parties, stay in to snuggle, start relationships and end them, remember to keep asking yourself What do I want?

It’s not always an easy question to answer. But now’s the time to start figuring it out. 

The post Dating in College: Starting Your Freshman Year appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Dating an Introvert: Tips to Help Your Relationship https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/dating-advice/dating-an-introvert/ Thu, 15 Feb 2018 09:00:25 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16033 Are you an extrovert dating an introvert? Here are a few tips to help you understand each other.

The post Dating an Introvert: Tips to Help Your Relationship appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
You’ve found someone you really click with and think they may be the one, except for one thing… they’re an introvert and you’re not. But this doesn’t mean that the relationship is bound to fail. Dating an introvert can actually add more balance to your life.

“It’s important to recognize that introverts are not necessarily socially anxious, shy, or loners. Introverts love talking and connecting with people, especially on a deep level, but they also need to have the proper balance and proportion, otherwise they get drained,” explains Dr. Michael Alcee, a clinical psychologist who specializes in introversion. “What truly differentiates introverts from extroverts is that they recharge from the inside-out, replenishing themselves by going into the world of ideas and the imagination rather than through prolonged social contact.”

Introverts bring a lot to a relationship and are wonderful people to be with. To help you understand your introverted partner, here are some tips you should keep in mind.

7 Tips for Dating an Introvert:

1. Sometimes introverts just need a push to be social.
There are a lot of introverts out there that truly do enjoy being in social settings once they get there. They just need a little push on occasion to make it happen, explains dating expert James Anderson. “Being social can be an energy drain for introverts but that doesn’t mean they don’t want to do it or value it. Being encouraging and appreciative of your introverted partner when they do make the effort to socialize with you can go a long way.”

2. Limit the amount of time and frequency spent in large, social gatherings.
An extrovert needs to understand that an introvert can only take so much being out in crowds. “After a while the amount of stimulation will force them to retreat so that they can recharge,” explains Dr. Venessa Marie Perry.  “Therefore an extrovert should understand that an introvert can be social, but will need to retreat to get some peace.” Perry emphasizes that this doesn’t mean that he/ she isn’t having a good time, they just enjoy people in small doses.

3. Planning goes a long way.
It’s very easy for an introvert to put off socializing, but harder if you make a plan. “If you really want to get your partner out of the house, you need to plan out your social calendar as much as you can. Make the plan, get them to commit to it, and stick to it. If an introvert knows when they’re going to be social and when they get to relax on their own, they’ll be much more agreeable,” says Anderson.

4. Don’t confuse an introvert’s quietness with being uninterested.
Introverts generally only like talking to a few people in a social situation—usually someone they know or have something in common with. “They can be social butterflies but for a short amount of time. Introverts need time being quiet. It doesn’t mean that they always want to be alone, but they just want to enjoy quiet time with the person they’re dating, maybe watching a movie or just being present with the person,” says Perry.

5. Pay extra attention to their actions when it comes to what they need.
An introvert may be reluctant to speak up when they’re feeling uncomfortable at a social gathering, or don’t want to go to an event that you’re set on going to. They may feel that they’re causing you to miss out.  That’s why it’s important to pay attention to any physical cues they give you that may indicate, ‘I want to go home’ or ‘I don’t want to go out tonight.’ You’re not a mind reader but if you’ve dated an introvert long enough, you’ll be able to start picking up on these cues.”

6. Developing a friend group of other extroverts can take a lot of pressure off.
Having a well-rounded group of friends that you can lean on for social interaction can take a lot of pressure off of your relationship. “If you need to be social four nights a week and you can count on your friends to be there for you for a few of those nights, the load will be much lighter on your partner. You’ll both be able to have the experiences you need and truly enjoy your times together,” says Anderson.

7. You can’t change an introvert.
It could be the social gathering of the century, but an introvert will rarely feel like they’re missing out, and you can’t change this. “It’s important to accept that an introvert is this way by nature, and it’s in their temperament,” says Alcee. “This is the way they’re built and, as a result of this wonderful sensibility, they bring lovely qualities to the relationship. Make sure to let your introvert partner know how special they are.”

The post Dating an Introvert: Tips to Help Your Relationship appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
Real Life Love Stories: Valentine’s Day Edition https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/dating-advice/real-life-love-stories-valentines-day/ Wed, 14 Feb 2018 09:00:29 +0000 https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/?p=16045 Love happens.

The post Real Life Love Stories: Valentine’s Day Edition appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>
It’s easy to make fun of Valentine’s Day or try to write it off as cheesy—there are all the hearts, chubby cupids, storefronts covered in various hues of pinks and reds. But Valentine’s Day is about more than a dinner out or a bouquet of flowers. It’s an opportunity to do something romantic, to tell someone how you feel, or even take a chance on someone new.

The people in this month’s featured love stories from the archives of the online dating site and app Zoosk  did just that. The way they met all feature Valentine’s Day in some small form. Whether the day gave them inspiration to say hello, became their first date, or was the reason they came together, all these real life love stories wouldn’t have happened without this cheesy, silly little day.

Debby and Robert
“Robert works a late shift so he asked if I would still be awake when he got home at 1:00 a.m. I said sure. I stayed up and we talked that night, or I should say morning, for almost three hours.”

I had been online dating for nine months and was beginning to think it was hopeless, when on Feb 9, 2015 I got a message from Robert. We started chatting and exchanged phone numbers that same night. Robert works a late shift so he asked if I would still be awake when he got home at 1:00 a.m. I said sure. I stayed up and we talked that night, or I should say morning, for almost three hours. And we continued to text or talk every night after that. Then, on February 11th he asked me, “Would you, could you, be my Valentine?” Of course I said yes! We had our first date on February 14th, Valentine’s Day, and it was FIREWORKS at first site. It feels so right between us… like we’re supposed to be together and have known each other forever. It’s such an amazing feeling that it’s hard to describe.

Gary and Karen
“We met on Feb 13th, just before Valentine‘s Day, which could be an awkward time to begin a relationship, but for us it was perfect.”

While looking for people online, I was initially attracted to the devotion that Gary relayed when telling the story of his marriage and his wife’s death in his profile. I wrote him just to say I was sorry for his loss, and that I wished him well in his search. But then we started writing back and forth—we wrote very honest, heartfelt messages and shared our histories with each other. I travel a lot for work and had several trips to make that delayed our meeting by almost a month, so by the time we met we had written and talked on the phone at length. We met on Feb 13th, just before Valentine’s Day, which could be an awkward time to begin a relationship, but for us it was perfect. Almost from the moment we met, I think we both knew this was it. We enjoy so many of the same things, and it seems our primary difference is Bears vs. Packers. We are both very loving, optimistic, laid back types of people, and we laugh through our days and our nights. We are both lovers of family, pets, travel, and it seems that each new encounter deepens our love. About 10 days ago we made a formal commitment with a ring. I cannot wait to spend my life with this uniquely amazing man.

Erika and Ernest
“It was storming in Alabama and Georgia, but through the rain he came to meet me for the first time.”

I received a message from my soulmate Ernest on February 9, 2014 and I quickly responded. I didn’t even look to see where he lived and lol, to my surprise he lived in Auburn, Alabama and I live in Atlanta, Georgia. That scared me at first but he quickly reassured me. Well, a few phone conversations and text messages later we decided to meet. And on Valentine’s Day at that! He said he would do whatever it took for us to be together. It was storming in Alabama and Georgia, but through the rain he came to meet me for the first time. It truly was love at first sight. My daughter loves him and his son loves me. We don’t always know what the future holds but we know we are together in it.

Jenn and Andrew
“I never expected that he would contact someone like me. He seemed so out of my league!”

One day I was scrolling through Zoosk and I came upon Andrew’s picture… He was handsome and his profile looked like he lived an interesting life as a firefighter and an outdoors man. I liked his profile, but I never expected that he would contact someone like me. He seemed so out of my league! But one day he messaged me and we hit it off. We spent weeks and weeks talking on the phone and staying up late just talking. Then on Valentine’s Day he met me at my job as my surprise Valentine. Ever since then we haven’t left each other’s sides! Seven years later we have a son, a second baby on the way, and our wedding will be in September of this year!

Tammy and Griff
“Your partner should be your best friend, your cheerleader, your lover, your hero… Your reason to smile again.”

After nine years of being alone and raising my son alone, I had just about given up on love. I found the dating site Zoosk and thought half-heartedly… Eh I’ll try it and if anyone answers me that’s worth my time, then maybe… Then one night in February, when it was just creeping in on Valentine‘s Day and I was feeling a little sad, I saw this man’s profile that caught my eye… He said he was a Packer fan or something like that. So, me being the wisecracker that I am, I messaged him and asked, “How did you end up way down here from Green Bay?” I guess my knowledge of sports hooked him, because we exchanged numbers and we talked about pro-wrestling for about six hours straight! About a week later, we had our first date, and the rest is history. We were married in Las Vegas, three months after our one year dating anniversary. I believe a relationship should build and that your partner should be your best friend, your cheerleader, your lover, your hero… Your reason to smile again.

Doyal and Debbie
“It was like the people around us were coming and going in super fast motion as we stayed in slow motion.” 

When we first started chatting we just had simple and causal hellos. Then right when I was about to say goodbye one night Debbie asked me a riveting question… “Do you know the difference between chemistry and energy? Do you believe in a soulmate?” It resonated with me because I understand metaphysics, quantum physics, and spiritual energy… I just knew I had to meet her. We met at a restaurant and sat and talked for five and half hours. It was like the people around us were coming and going in super fast motion as we stayed in slow motion, not wanting the day to end. Since that day we have never been apart and she definitely completes me. On Valentine’s Day Debbie knocked me out of my mind with a gift. It was a letter that she wrote to my mother (who passed away 25 years ago) thanking her for the greatest gift that she could of ever given her… Me. Debbie put this letter in a helium balloon and we took it up to a mountain and released it to the heavens. She also bought a star and named it Judy after my mother, so when we look out into the night stars we can find her. She has three wonderful children (two with special needs) and I have two wonderful children and we all have found love and friendship with one another.

The post Real Life Love Stories: Valentine’s Day Edition appeared first on The Date Mix.

]]>