When you reach your 40s a lot changes but not as much as you may think. By the time you’re dating in your 40s, you’ve experienced enough that your ideas about the world and your place in it don’t just come from your parents, your schooling, or what you’ve been told. You’ve learned a thing or two and have come up with your own ideas about the world and become accountable for your own life and happiness. As as result, the people you want to form relationships with change too. If you’re wondering what 40-year-old men want in a woman that’s different from younger men, the answer is plenty.
It’s easy to make assumptions about what men in their 40s want in a woman but to get to the heart of the matter, we turned to the popular online dating site Zoosk. They data-mined 656,356 profiles to see what words men in their 30s, 40s, and 50s mention most often when describing what they’re looking for in a romantic interest.
And though a lot of what men look for is the same, there are some key differences between 40-year-old men and other age groups.
Top Characteristics Men in Their 40s Want In a Woman
| 30s | 40s | 50+ |
| fun | fun | fun |
| honest | honest | honest |
| laugh | laugh | relationship |
| humor | humor | laugh |
| funny | caring | loving |
| nice | loving | sense of humor |
| sense of humor | kind | happy |
| smile | sense of humor | caring |
| caring | relationship | kind |
| open | happy | open |
| loving | have fun | smile |
| smart | loyal | intelligent |
| kids | family | romantic |
| down to earth | positive | active |
| happy | intelligent | easy going |
| family | easy going | down to earth |
| to have fun | beautiful | open minded |
Here are some key takeaways…
Men of all ages want a fun, honest women.
The most popular characteristic for all men of all ages is fun. And the second most popular characteristic for all men of all ages is honest. Across the board, men are looking for honest women they can have a good time with. (Interestingly enough, women’s top characteristic is honest as well.)
Men in their 40s want someone caring, loving, and kind.
Unlike their younger counterparts, who mention things like a nice smile or nice personality more often, men in their 40s bring up a caring, loving, and kind when describing who they want.
Men in their 40s value intelligent women more than younger men.
For men over 40 intelligence is the 16th most popular characteristic, while for men over 50 it jumps to the 13th most popular trait. Interestingly enough, men in their 30s don’t mention intelligence as often but instead use the word smart when describing the women they’re looking for.
All men love a good sense of humor
Perhaps this goes along with being fun, but men of all ages mention humor or a sense of humor as a top trait. And women who know how to have a good laugh are popular too.
40 year-old men want someone who’s loyal.
Unlike other age groups, men in their 40s list someone who’s loyal as a top trait. Perhaps because they’ve experienced a few heartaches or perhaps because they’re looking for someone who wants to be a partner in life and stay by their side.
Men in their 40s want happy, positive partners.
Another popular trait among all men was happy and, though it didn’t make the top list for other age groups, men in their 40s were interested in being with someone who’s positive as well.
After looking into what men in their 40s want there are a few key takeaways—for the most part, men of all ages want an honest, caring person who they can also have a great time and laugh with. However, men in their 40s mention put a lot of emphasis on the qualities of a good woman being things such as loyal, easy-going, and positive.
A man in his 40s isn’t that different from the younger men or older men you may have dated before. They simply have lived enough to want things their younger selves may not have valued, and are still looking for that person to share their life with.
