Although it\u2019s something everyone has done at some point, there\u2019s still a stigma against Internet stalking. In lieu of friendly conversation and asking a real human honest questions, we\u2019ve become more comfortable finding the information we want on our own, behind the privacy of our computer screens. It\u2019s a little intrusive, yes. But in an age where stranger danger has taken on a vast and unpredictable online persona, Internet stalking, to a degree, can be considered wise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If there\u2019s someone you met online who you\u2019re considering meeting in person, doing a little digging can be a smart move. Dating profiles are designed to show people\u2019s best side, so how do you know you\u2019re not getting duped? Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram accounts tend to be more authentic because they\u2019re friend-facing, and not meant to be introductory.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That being said, it\u2019s a fine line between getting a sense of the person you\u2019re dealing with for your own security and peace of mind, and being, you know, creepy. Just so you don\u2019t find yourself blurting out your new date\u2019s sister\u2019s boyfriend\u2019s name in a conversation, here\u2019s some guidelines.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
These moves are pretty harmless and can give you some valuable information.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A cursory scroll through her photos<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n What he or she chooses to share is as good an indicator of personality as the photos themselves. Is she a selfie-holic? Are his weekends riddled with red Solo cups? Does she love her dog as much as you love yours (a near-impossibility)? The photos your date chooses to share on Instagram or Facebook are probably pretty close to some of the first things you\u2019ll learn about them organically, so if you\u2019re nervous whether or not you\u2019ll hit it off, take a look at what their photos say about their personality and see if it appeals to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Another smart idea: Forward a pic or two to a trusted friend. We\u2019re all aware of stranger danger, but letting someone know whom you\u2019re with and how to identify them is a good way to cover your bases, safety-wise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A look at his interaction with his mom<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n How someone treats their parents can give insight into how they\u2019ll treat others, and since every mom on Facebook likes and comments her kids\u2019 photos and statuses incessantly and indiscriminately, you can usually gain some knowledge about who they are as a person and what kind of background they come from. Do they have a witty rapport with each other? Is it a lot of loving support? Do they always like and reply?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Scrolling through his status updates<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n What a person chooses to share with a few hundred peripheral friends can be very telling. Are they an over-sharer? Are they witty? Do they have a penchant for drama? Do they like to get political? Do they love the same memes as you? This is a great way to stake out your compatibility in a way that\u2019s not quite as guarded as a dating profile or initial personal interactions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is also a good way to identify any red flags. Everyone has their own deal-breakers, and if, for example, hashing out drama with an ex via Facebook, using foul language, or posting revealing photos is one of yours, you\u2019ll likely learn about them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n These behaviors don\u2019t quite respect a person\u2019s space, past, or privacy. They\u2019ll also make you feel crazy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Cataloging<\/b> his exes<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n This may be the fastest way to torture yourself. Walking into a dinner date feeling like you have to measure up to past loves can be a serious hit to your confidence, not to mention, it digs up a past for which you have no context. Everyone feels a sense of competition on the dating scene, but his or her past relationships ended for a reason, his or her platonic friendships are platonic for a reason, and the only way you can really learn the truth here is through patience and honest discussion. Knowing whether or not his last love was better looking (in your opinion) is only going to make you feel more nervous.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Friend requesting her under a fake account<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If his or her account is on lockdown, there\u2019s a reason why, and more often than not, the reason isn\u2019t a shady one. You\u2019ll have to get answers the old fashioned way: by chatting. A locked or limited profile can be full of intrigue, but trying to hack your way in sneakily is dishonest. Imagine the moment your new love finally learns that random friend request came from you!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Use the intrigue to your advantage! Everyone loves a little mystery, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n The deep Google search<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n You\u2019re not actually a private eye. If you find yourself on page three of a name search and you\u2019re delving into his high school track records, it\u2019s time to take a serious step back. If the tables were turned, would you feel comfortable with your date knowing where you parents live and all your brothers\u2019 names? Probably not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re feeling a little worried and you do a quick Google search to make sure your date hasn\u2019t been in the news lately, that\u2019s okay. Anything past that, and you\u2019ve ventured into a territory that a) should only be reserved for your favorite celebrities, and b) could run the risk of upturning what could be an actually intriguing talking point when you\u2019re getting to know each other the old fashioned way\u00ad \u2013 over dinner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Finally, take everything you learn with a grain of salt. Even though personal social media profiles give you a little more insight into a person, they can still diverge from who someone truly is, and that\u2019s what you\u2019re aiming to learn! A good match\u2019s personality is bound to shine through, so don\u2019t worry about sleuthing too hard.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Come on, you know you’ve done it. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":90,"featured_media":12909,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12902","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhoops, Too Far<\/h3>\n\n\n\n