{"id":13797,"date":"2016-11-25T01:00:24","date_gmt":"2016-11-25T09:00:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=13797"},"modified":"2022-05-23T00:59:03","modified_gmt":"2022-05-23T07:59:03","slug":"online-dating-first-message-to-a-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-women\/online-dating-first-message-to-a-man\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Make the First Move and Message a Man Online"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Stuck staring at your inbox waiting for that great guy you matched with to send you a message already? Why not take initiative and message him first? According to a study of online dating data, women who send an online dating first message are 2.5 times more likely to get a response than men are. And the men they get responses from tend to be more attractive too. (That\u2019s a win-win situation right there.) So what should you say in your online dating messages if you\u2019re a woman trying to make the first move?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To help you out, here are four quick tips to on how to initiate conversations with men while online dating:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Don\u2019t mass message<\/strong>
\nSending out dozens of the same messages to different guys is the online dating equivalent of running a call center. Yes, you might get a few men who are interested and write back. But will you be interested in them and will they be a good match for you? Probably not. Only send messages to men who actually strike your fancy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Be sincere in your approach<\/strong>
One of the cardinal rules in an online dating first message is to say more than hi. If you think about some of the worst messages you\u2019ve received from men, even men you liked, many of them were probably a bland hello or \u201chow\u2019s it going?\u201d How is someone supposed to respond to that?! Don\u2019t make the same mistake. Instead, find something you have in common in his profile and start the conversation with that. Did you both grow up in San Diego<\/a>? Great. Ask him where his favorite hike or restaurant in the area is. If you don\u2019t have anything in common, pick out something about him you want to learn more about. Does he have a cool picture of the sunset? Ask him where he took it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Don\u2019t expect a reply to every message<\/strong>
\nWhile it can be frustrating to craft a meaningful message only to hear nothing back, it\u2019s only natural. Everyone who\u2019s dated online, even the most attractive and successful people, don\u2019t hear back from everyone they\u2019ve matched with. Men don\u2019t receive as many messages as women but that doesn\u2019t mean they can\u2019t be unresponsive too. So don\u2019t let it get you down. While online dating, you\u2019ll both reject people and be rejected. It\u2019s part of the process of learning who and what you\u2019re truly looking for. Try to focus on the people who are genuinely interested in you and don\u2019t worry about those who aren\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Engage in a conversation to see if you want to meet up<\/strong>
\nFirst message sent? Great. Now follow up with some killer conversation. A great first message doesn\u2019t mean much without rapport. That\u2019s why you have to keep the conversation going. Don\u2019t just answer his questions without asking him something back\u2014that puts all the pressure on him. Instead follow up and make it easier for him to respond to you so both of you are moving things forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Making the first move is always tough and it can feel daunting to put yourself out there. But without that effort, you\u2019re the one waiting for the right man to message you. But for all you know, maybe the right one is waiting for you to message him.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

4 tips to help you initiate conversations with men while online dating. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":101,"featured_media":13798,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[886,889],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13797","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice-women","category-online-dating-first-message"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nHow Write a Man an Online Dating First Message<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Women get more responses from men when they write an online dating first message. 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To help you, here are 4 tips to on how to initiate conversations with men while online dating.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-women\/online-dating-first-message-to-a-man\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Date Mix\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Zoosk\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-11-25T09:00:24+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2022-05-23T07:59:03+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2016\/11\/23135417\/online-messaging-to-a-man.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"800\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Calvin Men\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@Zoosk\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@Zoosk\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Calvin Men\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How Write a Man an Online Dating First Message","description":"Women get more responses from men when they write an online dating first message. 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