Dating is hard enough with two people. When one or both of you has kids, things can get downright complicated. There are extra emotions and opinions to consider, and a whole lot of \u201cwhat if?\u201d scenarios to ponder. But if you\u2019re ready to meet someone, don\u2019t let having kids stop you. In fact, being a parent can actually make you a better dater: You\u2019re strong, you\u2019re capable, and you don\u2019t have time for playing games (unless that game is Candy Land). Dating with kids is possible, and here are some ways to make it less scary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1. Be honest with yourself about what you\u2019re looking for in someone.<\/strong> 2. Take your time.<\/strong> 3. But don\u2019t waste your time.<\/strong> 4. Check in with your kids.<\/strong> 5. Be honest about your situation.<\/strong> 6. Put yourself first sometimes.<\/strong> Remember to put yourself first sometimes. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":79,"featured_media":14188,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[977],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14186","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-with-kids"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
\nConsider your motivations for dating. Are you afraid of being alone? Are you worried your kids won\u2019t have a second parent? Do you just want to have a little fun, or are you ready to settle down? Knowing what you\u2019re looking for and why you\u2019re looking for it will help you make smarter dating decisions that better protect you and your family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nRegardless of how your last relationship ended, it\u2019s best to take things slow for a while. Jumping into another relationship too quickly can be tricky; the sooner you start dating, the more resistant your kids will likely be to your new date. Only you will know how much time is the right amount for you, but the key is to make sure both you and your kids are at peace with how your last relationship ended. You\u2019ll know you\u2019re ready to start dating when you don\u2019t need to do it, but simply want to do it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nDating with kids involves making a schedule and sticking to it. You\u2019re already juggling parent\/teacher conferences, play dates, and carpool duty. If someone can\u2019t commit to drinks or keeps canceling on dinner, it\u2019s ok to move on to the next match. Your time is precious, and there\u2019s someone out there who is worthy of having it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nDepending on how old your kids are they\u2019ll have a range of reactions to you dating. If your kids are in elementary or middle school, they might feel insecure or scared of how your relationship with them could change. If your kids are teenagers or adults, they\u2019ll likely be more aware of the possibilities and might be extra protective of you. The best thing you can do is check in with them and ensure you have solid family relationships before pursuing a romantic one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nMaybe you mention your kids right away in your online dating profile, or maybe you wait a few dates to see if things get serious before bringing them up. There\u2019s no one correct way to have \u201cthe kids\u201d talk. Just know that when things start to get serious with somebody, it affects more than just you\u2014it also affects your children, so honesty is the best policy. Of course, how much information you share is up to you. If your kids are a big part of your life, don\u2019t be afraid to bring them up and brag about them! But if you\u2019re still getting to know somebody and would rather not share too much personal information about your family, that\u2019s ok too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nThere\u2019s no escaping it\u2014if you\u2019re dating with kids, at some point you\u2019re going to feel guilty. You might feel guilty for spending time away from your children, or for spending money on yourself. Put the guilt aside and put yourself first for a change. Remember, you\u2019re a parent, but you\u2019re also a person! It\u2019s wonderful that you usually put your kids first, but it\u2019s your turn. Wanting to date is natural, and if you let your feelings of guilt win every time, sooner or later you\u2019ll resent that you never tried dating again.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"