{"id":14875,"date":"2017-08-03T01:00:39","date_gmt":"2017-08-03T08:00:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=14875"},"modified":"2021-10-27T07:03:53","modified_gmt":"2021-10-27T14:03:53","slug":"first-date-conversation-tips","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/first-date-tips\/first-date-conversation-tips\/","title":{"rendered":"12 First Date Conversation Tips That Won’t Make You Seem Weird"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

When it comes to dating, getting to the first date isn\u2019t the hard part anymore\u2014it\u2019s having the first real life\u00a0conversation with someone. Forget chemistry, what you ask and what you say can inevitably be the deciding factor in whether the relationship will make it to date number two. An easy, organic\u00a0conversation is always best, but naturally, we’re all a little nervous on first dates, which either makes us shy and quiet or turns us into chatter boxes or interrogators. That\u2019s why we came up with 12 fist date conversation tips to help your convo flow\u00a0smoothly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

12 Excellent first date conversation tips<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Admit you\u2019re nervous.
\n<\/strong>Chances are your date is nervous too, so coming out and admitting it can be an excellent icebreaker. Being honest is important and letting your date know how you’re feeling may help take some of the pressure off. Just make sure the conversation is still about getting to know each other. If you don\u2019t give the other person the chance to know more about you, they may not ask you out again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Ask questions.
\n<\/strong>Conversations should flow back and forth. If you\u2019re not asking the other person questions and are only talking about yourself, you\u2019ll either look A) not interested, B) self-absorbed, or C) both. Asking questions conveys engagement. If you\u2019re shy or unsure of what to ask, remember to think about topics ahead of time. (And if you need some help, check out this list of 75 Creative First Date Questions to Ask Anyone<\/a>.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Ask about their favorites.
\n<\/strong>Who doesn\u2019t like talking about their favorite food, hobby, or sports team? Asking your date what some of their favorite things are keeps the conversation light and fun. And, if you both seem to love mint chocolate chip ice cream, then you may have just found a reason to extend the date.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Don\u2019t spill your guts.
\n<\/strong>Be forthcoming and real, but don\u2019t turn the date into a therapy session. \u201cEase into talking about yourself\u2014remember intimacy is a bit at a time. Let him or her reveal a little, then you reveal a little,\u201d says relationship counselors and co-authors, Drs. Judith and Bob Wright<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00a05.\u00a0Avoid politics.
<\/strong>They say there are two things you should never discuss at the dinner table\u2014religion<\/a> and politics. The same holds true for the first date. When you have strong beliefs or opinions, it’s easy to get overexcited and even judgmental. Of course, where your date stands on certain issues is important to\u00a0a long and healthy relationship, but wait a few dates before diving into the political discussions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. Don\u2019t lie.
<\/strong>One of the most important first date conversation tips. Fudging the truth\u2014even a little\u2014on a first date means you\u2019re starting the relationship with a lie. \u201cWhen wanting to be liked, we may embellish, hide relevant data, and say anything to make ourselves\u00a0appear more authentic. However, if you continue to date, the truth will eventually come out,\u201d says Dr. Judith.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

7. Don\u2019t \u201cone up\u201d them.
\n<\/strong>Your date mentions taking their first trip overseas to London. Don\u2019t follow up by bragging about how you\u2019ve been to every European country and visit there three times a year. Nobody wants to feel like their experiences are insufficient. Instead, be more congratulatory and respectful. Everyone has different opportunities for different experiences.   <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. Ask about their job, don\u2019t ask about their salary.
\n<\/strong>It\u2019s fine to discuss work and jobs but how would you feel if someone asked you how much you make, if you own or rent, or what kind of car you drive? Those kinds of questions make it seem a little like all someone cares about is how much money you\u2019ll be able to spend on them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9. Talk about past relationships but avoid too much ex-talk.<\/strong>
\nUnless you’re specifically asked, avoid getting into relationships past. A recent survey<\/a> by the dating site and app Zoosk on what\u2019s okay to disclose and when, shows that nearly half of singles say past relationships, including recent breakups, shouldn’t be discussed until after a few weeks of dating. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

10. Speak up.
\n<\/strong>If the other person does something that makes you uncomfortable\u2014subtly puts you down, is rude to the waitress, makes snide comments\u2014don\u2019t just take it like a punching bag; say something! Dating is about finding the the one, not about torturing yourself with bad company.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

11. Don\u2019t start asking about the next date too soon.
\n<\/strong>You may be thinking about the next date, but you\u2019re still on date number one, so be present. \u201cIf you worry about what comes after the first date, chances are you\u2019ll be anxious, appear needy, and may try harder to impress the other person. Be on the date you\u2019re on now,\u201d says Dr. Bob.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

12. Don\u2019t talk negatively about yourself.
\n<\/strong>Modesty is appealing; low self-esteem is not. There’s no need to announce all your flaws on the first date. Joking about how bad you are at dating is also a huge turn off. It\u2019s okay to admit you\u2019re nervous but telling someone on a first date that you\u2019re bad at dating is like a director coming out before the movie to announce that it stinks. It kills interest or motivation the other person might have had.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When it comes to having a good first date conversation, it’s ok to stumble and make a few mistakes. There’s no getting around it, first dates are hard and can get awkward at times. But if you keep talking, remember these first date conversation tips, and focus on getting to know the other person you might surprise yourself by how easy the conversation will flow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tips about how to get the conversation rolling in a natural, easy way. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":16890,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[892],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14875","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-first-date-tips"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n12 First Date Conversation Tips That Won't Make You Seem Weird<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Getting the first date isn\u2019t the hard part \u2014it\u2019s having the first date conversation. 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