When most people think of December, they think of holidays and the New Year around the corner. But it\u2019s also a time to look back and remember both our successes and (hopefully not) our failures. Remembering can be a form of learning. For those of us who are in our 40s and single, reflecting upon our dating efforts from the past year is a way to learn from our mistakes and reinforce the positives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
To create a positive dating experience moving forward in the New Year, ask yourself these questions:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1. Did you make the effort to date?<\/strong> 2. Were you too picky?<\/strong> 3. Were you overwhelmed with too many choices that perhaps you let a good one slip by? 4. Have you let someone go because you thought a better catch was on the horizon?<\/strong> 5. Is your list of qualities you want in a partner realistic?<\/strong> These are just a few of the questions you should ask yourself as you reflect back and remember your dating experiences over the past year. There are so many factors that come into play while dating in your 40s. You don\u2019t want to settle, yet you do want to be sensible about your dating goals. Take this December to remember the past year and create a realistic game plan for dating in 2018. Let this be the year that, next December, you can remember a positive and fulfilling way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To read more of Tonia\u2019s work and learn about her book Single and Not Settling<\/em>, visit toniadecosimo.com<\/a> or follower her on Twitter at @ToniaDeCosimo<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Did you make an effort to date? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":96,"featured_media":15661,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[975],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15659","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-in-your-40s"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
\nSaying you want to meet someone and actually doing something about it are two different things. Think back over the past year and decide whether or not you put enough effort into meeting someone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nDid you not give certain people a chance because you thought they weren\u2019t your type or they weren\u2019t good enough for you? If you answered yes, you may want to rethink your standards and maybe give a person a second date.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\n<\/strong>Maybe it\u2019s time to slow down and give yourself a chance to really get to know someone before moving on to the next date.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nWe certainly don\u2019t want to settle, as discussed in my book, \u201cSingle and Not Settling! A Journey of Surviving the Dating World\u201d. However, who or what are you waiting for? If you find yourself saying goodbye to someone because of a vague hope for something more, you may not be giving that person (and yourself) a fair chance to see if it\u2019s right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\nRemember, nobody is perfect; everyone is going to have some flaw or baggage, especially as we get older in life and date people in their 40s and 50s. It\u2019s great to know what you want but you also shouldn\u2019t let the idea you have in your mind block you from the amazing reality that\u2019s right in front of you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n