{"id":15708,"date":"2017-12-20T01:00:21","date_gmt":"2017-12-20T09:00:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=15708"},"modified":"2023-11-10T14:59:31","modified_gmt":"2023-11-10T22:59:31","slug":"5-online-dating-message-tips-examples-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/online-dating\/online-dating-first-message\/5-online-dating-message-tips-examples-say\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Online Dating Message Tips: Examples of What to Say"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Dating message tips: you might not think you need them, but then&#8230; you filled out your online dating profile. You took the perfect profile pictures. You searched for potential matches and even found some that caught your eye. But that was just the beginning, the question remains&#8230; What should you say to them?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Composing a message is one of the hardest parts of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/zoosk\/zoosk-official-site\/\">online dating<\/a>. Should you pay them a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/compliments-for-women\/\">compliment<\/a>, or is that too forward? Should you use a pick-up line, or keep it simple? You want to catch their eye and stand out, but you don\u2019t want it to seem like you\u2019re trying too hard. Well, fear not, because we can help. Here are some online dating message tips to help you write&nbsp;something&nbsp;that has a high chance of getting a response&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What To Say on Dating Apps<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Dating Message Tips from the Experts<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><mark><mark style=\"background-color:#ffffff\" class=\"has-inline-color has-black-color\">Learning how to start a conversation on a dating app isn&#8217;t difficult. With a little practice and by following these tips, you&#8217;ll become increasingly comfortable.<\/mark><\/mark><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>1. Start with \u201chi,\u201d but give it a spin.<br> <\/strong>When you meet somebody in real life, chances are you do two things: say hello and tell them your name. So why not employ the same greeting tactic online? Saying hi and introducing yourself is polite, easy, and effective\u2014and you\u2019d be surprised by how few people actually do it in their online dating messages. But instead of just saying \u201chi,\u201d \u201chey,\u201d or \u201chello\u201d like everybody else does, make things interesting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Perfect first message for online dating with examples:<br> -How\u2019s it going? I\u2019m Elizabeth.<br> -Fancy meeting you here. I\u2019m Elizabeth.<br> -Hola, bonjour, ciao, guten tag, hello. I\u2019m Elizabeth.<br> -Come here often? I\u2019m Elizabeth.<br> -Oh, hey, I didn\u2019t see you there. I\u2019m Elizabeth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can even go so far as to create a standard greeting that\u2019s truly yours. The advantages of this are that you can create an opener that stands out, you can keep using it to test whether or not you\u2019re getting favorable responses, and you can change it if it\u2019s not working. Make sure that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/online-dating\/opening-lines\/\" data-type=\"URL\" data-id=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/online-dating\/opening-lines\/\">your opening line<\/a> is concise, readable, and inoffensive. Avoid making childish comments or jokes that might be an instant turnoff. \u201cHello, I\u2019m Elizabeth, and I\u2019m trying to solve a mystery\u201d would probably work much better than \u201cYou sure do look fine.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>2. Comment on their profile.<br> <\/strong>Commenting on someone\u2019s online dating profile shows that you actually read it and that you\u2019re a good listener. When it comes to opening lines for dating apps and meeting a new person&nbsp;online, it can be tempting to compliment their looks. And while physical compliments are nice, they can sometimes be, well, empty. Most people would rather receive a compliment about something they wrote in their profile. Bonus points if you add a little information about yourself. It keeps the conversation going and gives them something to respond to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Examples:<br> -I see that you like to cook. I\u2019m trying to be better at cooking myself. I made a great vegetarian lasagna a few nights ago.<br> -I like that you\u2019re into sports. My favorite is baseball. I\u2019m a lifelong Yankees fan.<br> -Your dog is very cute. I\u2019m a dog person too. I have an Australian Cattle Dog named W\u00fclf.<br> -I have some friends who went to Cornell. I wonder if we have any friends in common.<br> -I enjoy going to museums too. I enjoyed the Stephen Shore exhibit at the MoMA.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>By targeting prospective partners with similar interests, you can shorten the time it takes to comment on their profile. For instance, \u201cHey, I\u2019m John. I see you\u2019re an avid reader. What was the last great book you\u2019ve read?\u201d If you are looking for partners who have reading listed as an interest, you can recycle this opener as frequently as you need to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>3. Ask a question.<br> <\/strong>Asking questions is one of the most important dating message tips we can give. One of the best ways to start a conversation is by asking a question. Again, it gives them something to respond to. Even better if this can also relate to something they wrote in their profile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>-What\u2019s your favorite dish to cook?<br> -Where were your profile pictures taken?<br> -What\u2019s it like being a surgeon?<br> -Have you read any good books lately?<br> -What\u2019s your favorite hidden gem in your neighborhood?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This approach works because most people enjoy talking about themselves. However, it helps if you have a genuine interest. You may get a very involved response, but if your second message is \u201ccool\u201d or \u201csounds fun,\u201d you\u2019ve essentially thrown ice on the dialogue. In other words, find something on the profile that you actually want to know about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>4. Cut to the chase.<br>\n<\/strong>Be honest and say what you feel. That doesn\u2019t mean you have to be overly forward or aggressive; it means that if you\u2019re interested in somebody, it\u2019s ok to be clear about it. After all, isn\u2019t that what you signed up for when you joined an online dating site?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>-Your profile made me smile.<br> -I\u2019d like to get to know you better.<br> -Based on your profile, I think we\u2019d hit it off.<br> -I\u2019m interested in learning more about you.<br> -I think we make a great pair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>There\u2019s a fine line between being direct and applying pressure. If you come off too strong, you may sour what might otherwise be a meaningful connection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>5. Suggest meeting for a date.<br>\n<\/strong>Is it bold? Yes. Is it risky? Maybe. Is it effective? You bet. One of the biggest complaints about online dating is that people&nbsp;spend too much time messaging and not enough time actually dating. It\u2019s gutsy to ask someone out right away, but it sends the message that you\u2019re serious about your level of interest. Be bold! And have a plan. <em>Are you free?<\/em> doesn\u2019t give someone much to respond to. But <em>Are you free for coffee on Thursday?<\/em> does.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>-I\u2019d like to meet for a drink sometime if you\u2019re interested.<br>\n-Are you free for a date soon?<br>\n-Let\u2019s grab coffee sometime next week.<br>\n-Want to have dinner on Tuesday?<br>\n-Let me know if you want to go for a walk in Central Park.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Additional Suggestions for Successful Messaging<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>If you\u2019ve read and exercised the five tips above, you\u2019re going to be ahead of most people in the online dating community. However, these pro tips will launch you to the next level.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Be Both Interested and Interesting&nbsp;<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Conversation is a two-way street. You should have information to offer and have something to say about the other person\u2019s conversation points. Even if you have no experience in the matter, be engaged. \u201cNo, I\u2019ve never tried skiing. It looks difficult. How long did it take you to get decent at it?\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Ask Closed Questions<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cHow was your day?\u201d may be one of the most prolific bad questions in the English language. Everyone uses it, but it rarely gets a satisfactory response. You get responses like, \u201cgreat,\u201d \u201cnot so bad,\u201d or \u201ccould be better,\u201d which leads to you having to pick a new conversation starter. Instead, ask questions that require a specific response. \u201cWhat was the highlight of your day?\u201d or something more specific like, \u201cDid you make any good sales today?\u201d will get you much more information.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">\u201cListen\u201d for Signs of Boredom<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Look at your messaging history. If you\u2019ve noticed that the responses that you\u2019re getting are shorter and shorter, response times are getting longer, or the other person has gone silent, it\u2019s up to you to try to reignite the conversation. Don\u2019t draw attention to your belief that the other person is losing interest. Just start fresh. \u201cHey, I was thinking about something you said the other day, and I wanted to ask you \u2026\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Know When It\u2019s Time to Walk Away<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Your time and attention are valuable commodities. If you\u2019re finding that the conversation is dwindling or that the other person just doesn\u2019t seem interested, you can part with a \u201cgood luck\u201d or say nothing at all. You may not have done anything wrong. People join dating sites before they\u2019re ready sometimes. Or they may just find someone who they perceive to be a better fit for them. Whatever their reason may be, there are always other possibilities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>There you have it: some examples for constructing the perfect online dating message. Hopefully, some of these dating message tips will help you bag that next date. Remember to keep it short, simple, and polite, and you\u2019ll be getting replies in no time.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Go beyond a simple hello and craft the perfect message. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":79,"featured_media":28658,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[889],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15708","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-online-dating-first-message"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>5 Online Dating Message Tips, Plus Examples of What to Say<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Here are some super important dating message tips to help you write a first message with a high chance of getting a response.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" 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Based in Brooklyn, she's written about a variety of topics related to online dating, love, single life, and relationships. In her spare time, you'll likely find her somewhere Instagramming her dogs! You can find some of her other work at EliteSingles and SilverSingles. Elizabeth has been working with Zoosk to create engaging content to help online daters make meaningful connections and find lasting relationships.","sameAs":["https:\/\/www.elizabethentenman.com\/","https:\/\/x.com\/https:\/\/twitter.com\/elizabenten"],"url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/author\/eentenman\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15708","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/79"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15708"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15708\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/28658"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15708"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15708"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15708"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}