{"id":16250,"date":"2018-03-15T01:00:12","date_gmt":"2018-03-15T08:00:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=16250"},"modified":"2021-05-31T12:45:06","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T19:45:06","slug":"i-just-want-to-be-loved","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/i-just-want-to-be-loved\/","title":{"rendered":"I Just Want to Be Loved: Getting Past the Frustrations of Dating"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

When you\u2019re in the dating game, it can sometimes feel like you\u2019re on a non-stop merry-go-round, and you\u2019re about to throw up. You want to get off, but your mind is telling you just to hang on a little longer and it\u2019ll all be over soon. <\/span>But it just keeps on <\/span>spinning. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You go on date after date, meeting a mix of the ones who aren\u2019t that into you, the ones who you don\u2019t feel a genuine connection with, and the ones who are downright strange<\/span>. <\/span>It\u2019s no wonder most of us end up incredibly frustrated, and wondering what it is we\u2019re doing wrong. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you keep on watching your single friends slowly pair off, while you keep on throwing yourself out there and getting shot down, it can lead to feelings of loneliness, jealousy, and have a huge knock on your self-esteem, too. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

At the end of the day, we all just want to be loved, and when it’s just not happening for you it can make you feel low in all kinds of ways.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So here are some of our top tips on getting past the dating lows, so you can snap out of that funk you\u2019re in, and enjoy the single life again.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remember, it\u2019s not about you.
\n<\/b>When you\u2019re striking up connections with new people and going on a lot of dates but find yourself being rejected a lot, you might start looking inward and blaming yourself. What\u2019s wrong with me? <\/span>Why do I keep messing this up?! I just want to be loved. <\/span>Will I EVER find someone to love me?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here\u2019s the thing: when someone rejects you, hurts you, or disappears on you, it\u2019s one hundred percent on them. It\u2019s got nothing to do with you, so stop blaming or judging yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You could be spending your time and energy in a much better way. So b<\/span>e patient, be forgiving, and be strong, because dating isn\u2019t a bed of roses\u2014but I promise it\u2019s worth it in the end.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Realize that rejection gets you one step closer to the one.
\n<\/b>You might see being rejected as a terrible thing, but that\u2019s because you\u2019re looking at it the wrong way. Rejection is actually a blessing in disguise. You know why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because that person is doing you a massive favor in the long run. They\u2019re telling you that they aren\u2019t the one for you, and they\u2019re not allowing you to waste any more time on them. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So the next time you get knocked down, remember that you\u2019re one step closer to finding the one who<\/span> is<\/span> <\/i>your perfect match.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don’t get stuck in old, bad habits.
\n<\/b>Maybe you continue to date people who aren\u2019t a good match for you, and you don\u2019t even realize you\u2019re doing it. Maybe you select emotionally unavailable partners, or you\u2019re trying to fill a void within your own life. Or maybe you go for someone who is covered in issues because you like the idea of being able to fix them…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whatever it is, this will inevitably lead to you getting hurt or feeling taken advantage of. Take a look at your past dates and relationship history and try and see if there are any common characteristics between them. <\/span>Once you understand the pattern, you\u2019ll be able to begin changing it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Know that there’s no timeline when it comes to love
\n<\/b>So many of us get frustrated when we continue to go on dates that lead nowhere because we put ourselves on this <\/span>ridiculous<\/span> timeline. <\/span>We think we have to find our dream partner, fall in love, and get married by a certain age. And we worry what our friends or society will think or say about us if we aren\u2019t there. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just like your first kiss, your first relationship, and losing your virginity\u2014finding the one doesn\u2019t have a deadline on it. There is no right time to fall in love, and it\u2019s certainly not an achievement you have to tick off by a certain age.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let go of what you can\u2019t control.
\n<\/b>You are not the master of the universe, and there are so many things that you cannot control when it comes to dating. You could be smart, beautiful, kind and doing everything right, but still end up on <\/span>terrible<\/span> dates, or ones that just don\u2019t go anywhere.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s because people have minds of their own. You might meet someone who is perfect for you on paper, but they\u2019re simply in the wrong place in life to date you right now. You might meet someone who thinks you\u2019re incredible, but their ex ends up walking back into the picture. <\/span>So the next time something happens that is totally out of your control, accept that you can\u2019t do anything to change it, and move on.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take a break if you need to.
\n<\/b>If non-stop dating has left you feeling deflated or burnt out, it’s perfectly okay to pause and take some much needed time out. Just because you’re single, doesn\u2019t mean you<\/span> have<\/span> to be dating. Don\u2019t allow pressure from your family or friends or the culture force you to do something you\u2019re simply not enjoying anymore.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes we need time alone to work through our own problems, and give ourselves time and space to heal. Listen to what your gut is telling you. <\/span>Taking a break will allow you to regain perspective and clarity on what it is you\u2019re really looking for, take the pressure off, and help you recover from any of the negative energy that might\u2019ve built up within you from any of the recent dates you\u2019d like to forget.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remember, you are somebody who is worthy of love.
\n<\/b>We\u2019re led to believe that if we\u2019re not in a happy relationship, then there\u2019s something wrong with us. A string of bad dates can leave us in a permanent state of insecurity, and so we start looking inwards at what we can fix in order to be more desirable and worthy of someone else’s love. We think we need the perfect beach body, that we need to wear expensive clothes, or be an expert when it comes to flirting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I hope you know that you are not broken and you don\u2019t need fixing. You are perfect <\/span>exactly<\/span> as you are right now. <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dating has its low points, here’s how to get through them. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":141,"featured_media":16252,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,899,987],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16250","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-single-life","category-love"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nI Just Want to Be Loved - Getting Past the Frustrations of Dating<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"If you've been dating for a while and are thinking to yourself, I just want to be loved, know that it's natural to be frustrated and it's not your fault.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/i-just-want-to-be-loved\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I Just Want to Be Loved - 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