Most people start online dating feeling enthusiastic or at the very least, willing. Then after a number of frustrations, annoyances, and disappointments the eagerness to date wears down into exhaustion, resignation, and despair. There\u2019s no doubt that online dating can be a roller coaster with its fair share of ups and downs, but what do you do if you\u2019re starting to feel online dating fatigue but still really want to meet someone?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There are ways you can make online dating interesting that don\u2019t depend on who your date is but rather on who you are on your date.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Approach dating as a way to grow as an individual. If you approach dating as an opportunity for you to grow with yourself, you may feel like some of the pressure has gone away. <\/em>No matter who the person you\u2019re dating is, or how the date goes, you can still use the experience as a way to better yourself. Approach each encounter as a training ground to experiment with new behaviors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Try out different ways of chatting and connecting.Each date is an opportunity to explore different ways of communicating and embody different qualities you wish you had more of. Even if you\u2019re not interested in the person, use the time to practice trying out different dating behaviors that you need to work on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, I knew a woman who was a psychotherapist. When she went on dates she often molded the conversations by asking a ton of leading, profound questions to find out who someone was. This took the conversations she had to deeper levels than what her dates would have brought up on their own, but also may have been somewhat uncomfortable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The depth of sharing was really coming from her, not her dates. Once she became aware of her pattern, she chose to practice a new behavior. She committed to intentionally sitting back and seeing how her dates filled the space and time without her directing the conversations to deeper levels. What did her dates share about themselves? Did they ask her questions? Did they keep the conversation on the surface level or would they move it to a deeper level without her having to take it their herself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ultimately, she was still able to have the deeper conversations she craved but only with men who were really looking for the same thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re looking to mix up how you date, a good idea is to reflect on your dating style and ask yourself these questions: <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Before going out on the date, have a specific intention (choose one thing) of what you want to practice. If you make personal growth one focus of dating, then you won\u2019t feel nearly as disappointed if you discover you\u2019re not interested in someone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n