{"id":16880,"date":"2018-06-24T01:00:44","date_gmt":"2018-06-24T08:00:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=16880"},"modified":"2021-05-31T12:30:02","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T19:30:02","slug":"what-is-considered-cheating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/relationship-advice\/what-is-considered-cheating\/","title":{"rendered":"What Is Considered Cheating? Tips on What It Is and Isn’t"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Cheating is very difficult to define, because it means different things to all of us. We all have our own expectations about what is and isn\u2019t appropriate, and if someone violates these, we can feel betrayed.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s difficult for me, or anyone else, to tell you what those boundaries and expectations should be, because it\u2019s <\/span>your<\/span> relationship and entirely your choice. <\/span>That being said, there are a few situations we can all identify with, and can generally say whether this should or shouldn\u2019t be tolerated.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Being attracted to other people of your preferred sex.
\n<\/b>We are human beings, and it\u2019s totally normal for us to be attracted to people other than our boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife. It doesn\u2019t become cheating until you act on said attraction. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, if you\u2019re someone who makes a point of voicing those attractions often, especially in front of your partner, it might not count as cheating, but it does make you pretty mean.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Having a close friendship with someone of your preferred sex.
\n<\/b>As humans, we have self-control, and we can choose what we do and do not do. That means that we can have completely platonic relationships with people who are drop dead gorgeous, and not end up in bed with them. Usually when we become friends with someone, we don\u2019t even notice how attractive they really are, because we\u2019re more interested in all their other amazing qualities.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the person you\u2019re dating feels threatened or jealous about your platonic friendships, it\u2019s probably because they\u2019re insecure, and you need to re-think whether you should even be dating them.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Flirting.
\n<\/b>It\u2019s healthy to have attention from someone other than your partner now and then, because it helps you see yourself as an individual and can give you a little confidence boost too.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Some of us are naturally flirty people, and it might seem like we\u2019re flirting with every person we cross paths with, but that\u2019s just our friendly and charming personality coming out. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Flirting is usually harmless\u2014when there are no ulterior motives. But if you\u2019re out with your partner and they prefer to ignore you while flirting with a bunch of strangers, there might be more to it.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remaining friendly with an ex.
\n<\/b>Some people maintain healthy, non-sexual relationships with their exes. There\u2019s nothing wrong with this, as long as you\u2019re open and honest about it from the beginning. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your partner should be secure enough to be okay with you being on friendly terms with someone you used to date, knowing that is now history, and not a threat to your current relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Having an online dating profile.
\n<\/b>This one really depends on how long you\u2019ve been dating someone, and whether or not you\u2019ve had the \u201care we\/aren\u2019t we\u201d exclusivity chat. If you\u2019ve committed to date one person and nobody else, you\u2019re essentially agreeing to delete your dating apps and profiles, because you have no reason to still be looking for someone.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re actively using a dating profile to flirt with people other than your partner who you\u2019ve committed to, then yes, it\u2019s cheating. You can\u2019t argue that it\u2019s just friendly and innocent, because why be on a dating site if you\u2019re looking for friends?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kissing someone once.
\n<\/b>The truth is, you\u2019re probably gonna have some kind of insane chemistry with someone at some point who isn\u2019t your partner. This might end up leading to a passionate, in the moment kiss, which never goes any further than that. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is definitely one of those grey areas, and it depends on whether that violates your expectations of your partner or not. But chances are, it didn\u2019t mean a whole lot to either of those people.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sleeping in the same bed with someone of your preferred sex.
\n<\/b>Again, one of those super grey areas. If you\u2019re drunk and nothing happens, there\u2019s no touching or cuddling or kissing of any kind, it\u2019s not cheating. But you\u2019re best off letting your partner know that it happened. And if you\u2019ve got nothing to hide, why wouldn\u2019t you?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re doing it regularly, and there\u2019s not any kind of alcohol involved, it gets weird real quick.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Getting a dance at a strip club.
\n<\/b>Some women are totally okay with this, and others are definitely not. If you\u2019re worried about potentially offending or hurting your partner in any way, you\u2019re better off letting her know of your plans before you go and do something like this.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you are getting turned on by a naked stranger who\u2019s dancing erotically in front of you, or sitting on your lap, this can be seen as disrespectful to your partner, even though it\u2019s not exactly cheating.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anything sexual that happens when you\u2019re drunk.
\n<\/b>So many people use alcohol as an excuse for doing things they are too scared to do when they\u2019re sober, but really want to. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If your partner claims they blacked out or don\u2019t remember sleeping with that stranger they met in the club, they\u2019re not willing to take responsibility for their actions, and therefore aren\u2019t ready to be in a healthy and committed relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don\u2019t need me to tell you that this totally counts as cheating, even if they <\/span>claim<\/span> to not remember it.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

People are all different. Some couples choose to have open relationships, where they can have sex with whoever they want, while others would be really hurt by their partner flirting with someone else. Most couples don\u2019t have this chat with each other where they make their expectations clear, which often leads to one person being betrayed or rejected, because they don\u2019t see eye-to-eye on various issues.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Be upfront at the beginning of your relationship, and make your expectations clear so you avoid getting hurt in the long run.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are a lot of grey areas. Let’s clear them up. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":141,"featured_media":16881,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[891,898],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16880","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationship-advice","category-relationship-problems"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhat Is Considered Cheating? Tips on What It Is and Isn'tWhat Is Considered Cheating? Tips on What It Is and Isn't<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"When it comes to what is considered cheating there are a lot of grey areas. 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