{"id":17533,"date":"2018-10-06T01:00:45","date_gmt":"2018-10-06T08:00:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=17533"},"modified":"2021-05-31T10:56:34","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T17:56:34","slug":"respond-to-breadcrumbing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/respond-to-breadcrumbing\/","title":{"rendered":"4 Smart Ways to Respond to Breadcrumbing"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Have you heard of breadcrumbing? It\u2019s the new ghosting. Well, it\u2019s the newest modern dating lingo to describe a previously unheard of phenomenon in the decades of dating past. It\u2019s even got it\u2019s own <\/span>Urban Dictionary entry:<\/span><\/a> “The act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal text messages (ie “breadcrumbs”) to members of the opposite sex in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort.” <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Basically, to be breadcrumbed is to be texted, or snapchatted, or DMed, just enough that you keep someone in mind, but not enough for them to actually put in the effort to date you. It\u2019s a strategy with mysterious motivations behind it. Do they want to keep you on the line just in case they need a backup date, or a backup to the backup? Are they trying to make sure you remember they\u2019re around and are willing to send mildly flirtatious vibes your way? Why would someone spend the time doing this, without intentions of actually pursuing something?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you <\/span>suspect you\u2019re being breadcrumbed?<\/span> Here\u2019s a guide for deciding what you\u2019re willing to do about it. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Call them out.
\n<\/b>Often breadcrumbing is about giving yourself an ego boost, so don\u2019t give in to the other person and make them feel good about their behavior. If they pop back up after weeks of radio silence with a casual flirty text, call them out on it. You don\u2019t have to be blunt or accusatory; a simple \u201cHaven\u2019t heard from you in a while\u201d is a subtle way to prompt them to explain their absence and sudden resurgence. If they don\u2019t take that bait, you can always outright ask. Clear and honest communication is never a bad thing, and just because they\u2019re not holding themselves to that standard doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Ignore them.<\/strong>
\nPeople breadcumb when they\u2019re bored. If a guy has been without female attention for too long, he might turn to breadcrumbing to ensure he\u2019s still capable of captivating an audience. Maybe he\u2019s got nothing better to do that night and just wants the thrill of knowing he can get you interested again. If he\u2019s back after three months and still wants to send you GIFs, you don\u2019t need to respond\u2014unless you’re bored too. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Give them a break.<\/strong>
\nLike most behaviors, people probably aren\u2019t thinking  that about breadcrumbing you consciously. It\u2019s a compulsion, an unheathy emotional manipulation style.  They probably aren\u2019t able to articulate what it is they\u2019re doing or why they\u2019re doing it. That doesn\u2019t make it right, but it does make it less personal. It also means if you call it out as breadcrumbing, they might not know what that means. So you can potentially be pretty laid back about it, and say something like, “Not sure if you even realize you’re doing this, but I feel a bit breadcrumbed.” Of, if you’re still interested in them, you could even say, “Want to throw something more than a crumb my way?”<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Ask them why.
\n<\/b>If you ask them straight up why they\u2019re just occasionally dipping back into your digital life, they might feel compelled to answer honestly, or at least take a good look at themselves and wonder what\u2019s driving their behavior. If you\u2019re still interested in actually getting to know them, asking them for some answers might be the only path forward. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It can be hurtful to realize you\u2019re being strung along by someone who probably doesn\u2019t have real intentions of dating you. The good news is, there\u2019s no reason you have to participate in it. If you find yourself getting caught in the crumb trap, you\u2019re the one who  has the power. You can always choose to end the cycle by not picking up that breadcrumb. <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you find yourself getting caught in the crumb trap, remember that you\u2019re the one who\u00a0 has the power.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":159,"featured_media":17534,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,888],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17533","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-online-dating"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n4 Smart Ways to Respond to Breadcrumbing<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Do you suspect you\u2019re being breadcrumbed? 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