{"id":17539,"date":"2018-10-10T01:00:49","date_gmt":"2018-10-10T08:00:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=17539"},"modified":"2021-05-31T10:55:54","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T17:55:54","slug":"feeling-unwanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/feeling-unwanted\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Things to Know When You’re Feeling Unwanted"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Dating can often feel very lonely. Maybe you’re not getting any matches on dating apps, or you\u2019re tired of going on dates with an open mind and heart only to be disappointed over and over again. When you keep striking out and start to worry that you\u2019ll never feel that spark again, you may start to feel that odd, discomforting feeling of being unwanted creeping over you\u2014even if logically, you tell yourself it’s not true, somehow it’s still there nagging at you. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you haven\u2019t made a match in ages, it\u2019s common to suspect that the problem is you. But it\u2019s important to remember that while feeling unwanted is a valid emotion, you are never the problem. You don\u2019t need to let that become your narrative. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Although it’s easier said than done, here are a few things to remind yourself of when you\u2019re feeling unwanted that may help you move past it.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re not the only one.
\n<\/b>Feeling unwanted is a part of life\u2014 it happens to everyone at one point or another. Even the most confident, conventionally attractive people feel it. Loneliness is hard to combat, and when it comes with the added baggage of feeling like you\u2019ll be single forever, it\u2019s even harder. Try opening up to friends about it. You might be surprised at who can identify with you.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your worth is not decided by who wants you.
\n<\/b>You are the only person who gets to decide what your measure of self-worth is. If it\u2019s dependent on who wants you, maybe it\u2019s time to do some reflection on why that\u2019s the case. Try making a list of all the things you like about yourself, and what\u2019s important to you when you envision your self-worth. Being found desirable by potential matches on dating sites probably won\u2019t make that cut. Your empathy for others and passion for the things that excite you count way more than any reasons why a two-date fling didn\u2019t turn into something more.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s really not the truth.
\n<\/b>Just because you haven\u2019t heard any searing declarations of love lately doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019re not desirable. It only means you haven\u2019t met someone you\u2019re compatible with. There are a lot of potential boyfriends, girlfriends, and partners in the world. It makes sense that you might have a few dips in your dating game. It\u2019s okay to feel unwanted, but try to remind yourself that the feeling, like so many others, is temporary. You\u2019re bound to hit your stride again.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Your friends want to be around you.<\/b>
\nBeing romantically desired is not the most important thing in life. Platonic relationships can outlast romantic ones, and you need them even more. Friendships are foundational to a life well-lived, and they can be just as nourishing as a romance, if not more so. The stakes are different in a friendship; you don\u2019t have to want to be each other\u2019s partner for life, and sustaining a friendship carries less pressure. When you\u2019re feeling unwanted, just remember that you have friends who will always care about you. It sounds cheesy, but it\u2019s really true. Let your friends help you through this rough patch. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Make the best of it.<\/b>
\nThis lull in your romantic life may not have been planned, but you can make the best of it while you\u2019re in it. Now\u2019s the perfect time to spend less time agonizing over the opening line of your first message and spend more time doing the things you love. Take up a beloved hobby that\u2019s fallen by the wayside while you\u2019ve been busy with an active dating life. Catch up with old friends. Volunteer for a cause you believe in. It\u2019ll be good for you and your community, and serve as a distraction from dissecting your recent matches that went nowhere.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re pretty great.
\n<\/b>Yes, you are, because you\u2019re just another human in the world who\u2019s trying to do their best. If you care for yourself and the people around you, you\u2019re already doing a great job. You already know you don\u2019t need validation from potential romantic partners, but try to be gentle with yourself when the lack of it stings anyway. This, too, shall pass, and you\u2019ll be stronger because of it. <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Feeling unwanted is a part of life\u2014even the most confident, conventionally attractive people feel it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":159,"featured_media":17540,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,899],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17539","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-single-life"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n6 Things to Know When You're Feeling Unwanted<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"If you haven\u2019t made a match in ages, it\u2019s common to suspect that the problem is you. 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