{"id":18482,"date":"2019-03-12T14:00:33","date_gmt":"2019-03-12T21:00:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=18482"},"modified":"2021-05-31T09:32:02","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T16:32:02","slug":"should-i-text-him-first","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/should-i-text-him-first\/","title":{"rendered":"Should I Text Him First? 3 Times You Should and 3 You Shouldn’t"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

You\u2019d think adding an additional way to communicate would be helpful for dating in the 21st century, but it\u2019s really just opened up a bunch of new problems. You can\u2019t properly assess tone, and if everyone is on their phone all the time, why isn\u2019t he responding soon enough?? <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For your own sanity, follow these tips to figure out when you should and shouldn\u2019t text him first:<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DO: If you want to set up a first date.<\/strong>
\nIt\u2019s 2019, and it\u2019s absolutely fine for you to set up a date. It\u2019s even fine if he is the one who asked you out, but you\u2019re the one working on solidifying plans. It shows you\u2019re interested, independent, and want the date to happen, which are all positive.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DO: If you just saw him.<\/strong>
\nLet\u2019s say you\u2019ve exchanged numbers, but haven’t texted yet when you happen to run into him at the gym when you\u2019re wearing the cutest dang leggings. Let\u2019s say you exchange some witty, sexy repartee and then he\u2019s got to book it to hang out with his bros. Text him once he leaves or a little while after. A cute, \u201cIt was nice seeing you!\u201d or something like that keeps up the emotional momentum that you guys already built and will hopefully move things into date territory.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DO: If you haven\u2019t heard from him in a couple of days.<\/strong>
\nIt\u2019s not as common for guys today to follow strict \u201cdon\u2019t contact her for X number of days\u201d rules, but things happen. He might be busy at work or dealing with a personal issue. If you haven\u2019t heard from him in a couple of days, send a  text like, \u201cHope you\u2019re having a good day,\u201d or if you have a date coming up, \u201cLooking forward to Friday!\u201d It shows you\u2019re still interested, but not overeager or pushy. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DON\u2019T: If you\u2019ve sent more than three unanswered texts over a period of time.<\/strong>
\nNothing turns someone else off as much as the overeager texter\u2014the texter who shoots off three texts at a time and doesn\u2019t even wait for a reply. You don\u2019t want to seem desperate, so play it cool. A good rule of thumb to follow is to only send one text at a time. But maybe you send a \u201cgood morning!\u201d text once a day over three days and get no response. Don\u2019t send a fourth one. You don\u2019t want to be the only one putting energy into a relationship, so don\u2019t be the one putting all the energy in before you even get started. You want someone to meet you halfway, so make sure to check that it\u2019s that way from the beginning.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DON’T: If you don\u2019t have something thoughtful to say.<\/strong>
\nYou want to text him, but don\u2019t really know what to say, so you send him a simple  \u201chey!\u201d Sometimes keeping it vague is ok, but to be a good conversation starter, show your interest by being thoughtful with what you bring up. A \u201chey\u201d every time is boring. Maybe you discussed a movie coming out the last time you talked and you saw a new trailer for it has been released. Sending the link to the trailer along with a, \u201cRemember when we talked about this?\u201d shows you\u2019re thinking about him and care about what you talked about enough to remember it.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

DON’T: If you set up the last date, and now it\u2019s his turn to set up the second one.<\/strong>
\nSome guys aren\u2019t clear. They\u2019ll say, \u201cThat was great! Let\u2019s go out again!\u201d And thennnnn you never hear from them again. Let\u2019s say you set up the first date, and he\u2019s told you, \u201cHey, I\u2019d love to go out again.\u201d You hopefully said something like, \u201cI\u2019d like that! Just text me to set up plans.\u201d Now that you\u2019ve set that scene, don\u2019t text him first. If he\u2019s interested, he\u2019ll set up the next date. If he\u2019s not, you\u2019ll know quickly and can move onto the next cute guy. Again, you want to make sure that the energy you\u2019re putting in is equal. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dating is complicated enough. Texting shouldn\u2019t be too! Following these rules can keep yourself sane and make sure whatever new relationship you\u2019re about to start is a positive one.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Because sometimes you definitely should and others… not so much. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":177,"featured_media":18493,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,886],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18482","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-dating-advice-women"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nShould I Text Him First? 3 Times You Should and 3 You Shouldn't<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"For your own sanity, follow these tips to figure out when you should and shouldn\u2019t text him first. 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