{"id":18575,"date":"2019-03-20T01:00:13","date_gmt":"2019-03-20T08:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=18575"},"modified":"2021-05-31T09:29:36","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T16:29:36","slug":"natural-flirt","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What does it even mean to \u201cflirt\u201d with someone?&nbsp;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Well, in a nutshell, it\u2019s when two people are communicating in a playful way with each other, creating tension, energy, and excitement\u2014and an important note is that it should be enjoyable for BOTH people. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here\u2019s how you can be a more natural flirt.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Practice, practice, practice.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A large part of flirting is being completely comfortable and confident talking to people you don&#8217;t know. Many of us find this intimidating, and avoid such encounters, but in doing so we miss out on so many potential connections, friendships, and relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, how do you become confident at this? <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You practice. Then you practice some more. And you keep on practicing until you feel comfortable and confident doing it, because you\u2019ve removed any of the fear or anxiety by forcing yourself out of your comfort zone.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Things might be awkward to begin with, but that\u2019s okay\u2014this is part of the process. This is how we improve. Quitting is only going to hold you back.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Mirror the body language of the other person.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There has been a lot of research done that suggests when we feel comfortable and connected to someone we\u2019re talking to, we end up mirroring each other\u2019s body language. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, if they have a hand resting on their face, you can gently bring your hand up to yours\u2014which will put them at ease. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If they have their legs crossed or their arms folded across their chest, it means they\u2019re closing themselves off to you, which is a sign this might not be the best person to flirt with. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Pay specific attention to the other person.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Like I mentioned earlier, if only one person is enjoying flirting, then it\u2019s a failure. It has to be mutually enjoyable. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, how do you know if the other person is enjoying it?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">By paying close attention to them. This means getting out of your head, and into the moment. Focus, and be present. Don\u2019t think about something funny to say, or playing it cool. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you bring your focus to the person in front of you, you can understand what they desire, and then try and give that to them.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Give compliments.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re new to this, compliments are a great way to break the ice. Find something genuine and interesting to say that will help you stand out from everyone else.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, women get told they\u2019re hot\/sexy\/pretty ALL the time. You\u2019re not making yourself stand out when you say that.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, noticing the yellow dress she\u2019s wearing and saying something like, \u201cThat color really brings out your eyes,\u201d is much more personal, and authentic. Be<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> person. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Create an emotional experience..<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting is about creating an emotional experience, and you can\u2019t do this when you\u2019re keeping things logical. So ditch talking about politics or science, and start talking about something this person is passionate about. People come alive when they speak about their passions. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take down your wall a little, and get comfortable expressing yourself emotionally. People really love conversations like this.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>You need to be communicating with people who are looking for the same thing.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re trying to flirt with someone who\u2019s totally not interested, or on a different page than you, it won\u2019t be received well. Feel into the situation, and do your best to read this person. If things aren\u2019t flowing, or you\u2019re being shut down, move on.&nbsp;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Flirting is only fun in pairs! <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Smile more.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is a simple one, but consciously smiling more helps to open up your face, and draw other people towards you. It also helps us to be received as warm, friendly people, whom others feel safe with\u2014a great foundation for some flirting to begin!<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Look, then look away.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Eye contact is sexy. If there\u2019s someone you\u2019re interested in, look at them until they catch your eye. Hold that gaze for a few seconds, smile, then look away. This will let them know you\u2019ve noticed them, and give them an invitation to come over and talk to you.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Think about why you want to be better at flirting?<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Why do you want to become a more natural flirt?&nbsp;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it to get more people to be attracted to you?&nbsp;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If so, flirting isn\u2019t always the answer. All you really need to do is to be more genuine. Be yourself, and be confident in who you are, and people will be drawn to you. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being terrible at flirting is definitely not the worst thing in the world, and plenty of people have managed to bag themselves long term relationships without mastering this skill. However, there are things you can do get better at if if you want to.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":141,"featured_media":18606,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,974],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18575","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-flirting"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Be a More Natural Flirt<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Be a More Natural Flirt\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Date Mix\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Zoosk\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-03-20T08:00:13+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-05-31T16:29:36+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"800\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Shani Jay\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@Zoosk\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@Zoosk\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Shani Jay\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt","description":"Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt","og_description":"Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/","og_site_name":"The Date Mix","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Zoosk\/","article_published_time":"2019-03-20T08:00:13+00:00","article_modified_time":"2021-05-31T16:29:36+00:00","og_image":[{"width":800,"height":600,"url":"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Shani Jay","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@Zoosk","twitter_site":"@Zoosk","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Shani Jay","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/"},"author":{"name":"Shani Jay","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#\/schema\/person\/84f8c32d40fc01dd6a77082438f0cb28"},"headline":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt","datePublished":"2019-03-20T08:00:13+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-31T16:29:36+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/"},"wordCount":867,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg","articleSection":["Dating Advice","Flirting"],"inLanguage":"en"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/","url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/","name":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg","datePublished":"2019-03-20T08:00:13+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-31T16:29:36+00:00","description":"Unfortunately, we\u2019re not all natural born flirts. Even some of the most confident people can freeze up around someone they have feelings for. But that\u2019s okay, because like most things, this is something that you can improve on.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/dq1eylutsoz4u.cloudfront.net\/2019\/03\/18103022\/natural-flirt.jpg","width":800,"height":600,"caption":"A man who thought he wasn't a natural flirt, smiling at a girl on his shoulders who's smiling back at him."},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/natural-flirt\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Single Life","item":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"Flirting","item":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/single-life\/flirting\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":4,"name":"How to Be a More Natural Flirt"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/","name":"The Date Mix","description":"Dating and Relationship Advice for Today&#039;s Daters","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#organization","name":"The Date Mix","url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/TDM-logo.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/TDM-logo.jpg","width":400,"height":400,"caption":"The Date Mix"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Zoosk\/","https:\/\/x.com\/Zoosk"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#\/schema\/person\/84f8c32d40fc01dd6a77082438f0cb28","name":"Shani Jay","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en","@id":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/avatar_user_141_1523037893-96x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/avatar_user_141_1523037893-96x96.jpg","caption":"Shani Jay"},"description":"Shani Jay is the Creatrix &amp; Goddess In Chief of Revoloon. Ask her what she does for a living, and she\u2019ll tell you she holds a mirror to your soul, so you can see how beautiful you already are. Shani is a bestselling author and internationally published writer. Her articles have reached and touched millions, while her books have made their way into the hands and hearts of thousands of women worldwide. You can also find some of her work at SilverSingles and EliteSingles. Shani has been working with Zoosk, sharing her knowledge and creating engaging content for online daters looking to make real connections with like-minded singles.","sameAs":["https:\/\/www.shanijay.com\/"],"url":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/author\/shani-jay\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18575","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/141"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18575"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18575\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18606"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18575"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18575"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18575"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}