{"id":19082,"date":"2019-06-15T01:00:44","date_gmt":"2019-06-15T08:00:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=19082"},"modified":"2021-05-31T08:42:48","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T15:42:48","slug":"signs-fear-of-intimacy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/relationship-advice\/signs-fear-of-intimacy\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Signs That You Have a Fear of Intimacy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being fearful of intimacy can impact your ability to find love and stay in a healthy relationship. Even if you really want to be with someone, there&#8217;s still that part of you that gets scared about being close. If you think your lack of healthy relationships comes from a place of fear or if you think your relationship problems coms from a fear of getting to close to someone, check out some of the signs that show you have a fear of intimacy.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>1. You push people away.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not physically but you&#8217;re doing things that create distance between you and your partner, which inevitably leads to them leaving you. Perhaps you\u2019re pushing them away by not communicating or sharing your feelings, making yourself too busy, being mean or rude, or doing things to show you don\u2019t care about them. When you push people away like this, there&#8217;s usually a reason why.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>2. You always end up with people who are no good for you.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your relationships always end badly, take a look at who you\u2019re dating. Is there a trend? Chances are your exes have some similar qualities that contribute to your failed relationships. You may know the person is bad for you but stay with them anyways because you subconsciously want the relationship to fail. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is a sure sign you have a fear of intimacy because you\u2019re letting yourself end up with people who are not good for you. A part of you knows it won\u2019t work out and you&#8217;ll eventually be single again.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>3. You sabotage your own relationships.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another sign you fear intimacy is that you find a way to ruin every romantic relationship you&#8217;re in. Have you cheated on partners in the past? Made yourself extremely hard to get close to? Always put your partner last? Chances are you&#8217;re doing so because deep down, you don\u2019t want the relationship to last. You fear that it will turn into something more than what it already is, and do your best to stop that. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>4. You\u2019re over-committed to your job or hobby.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you fear intimacy, you aren\u2019t prioritizing intimacy. Instead, you over-commit yourself to other things. For example, your job. You stay later than you really need to or are constantly on your phone. This creates added distance between you and your partner. &nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Or, perhaps you over-commit to working out every day for hours, or to another hobby, and don\u2019t give any time to your relationship and partner. In other words, you\u2019re distracting yourself from your fear of intimacy rather than dealing with it. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>5. You always let yourself get emotionally closer to someone else.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even though you have a partner at home, you&#8217;re emotionally closer to someone else, which can be a coworker, an ex, a friend of the opposite sex, etc. Why are you telling them deeper and more personal things about yourself instead of telling your partner? <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Probably because you won\u2019t let yourself get emotionally invested in the other person. There is also a very important part of intimacy that is emotional, and when you become more emotionally intimate with someone else, it\u2019s a sign that you fear intimacy and getting close to your partner.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>6. You think you\u2019re putting yourself out there, but you\u2019re hardly trying.<br>\n<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You say you want to be with someone, but when you take a step back, how hard are you really trying? Are you going online and actively looking and keeping conversations going, or do you offer very vague responses and don\u2019t ask questions back? &nbsp;When you&#8217;re out at a bar, do you let guys or girls approach you or do you spend your time looking down at your phone, unaware of all the potential around you? &nbsp;You might be trying to convince yourself that you are trying to find love, but subconsciously, you\u2019re stopping yourself because of a deeper fear of intimacy.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Many people fear intimacy\u2014it&#8217;s hard getting close to someone and nobody wants to be rejected. But getting close to people and letting them get close to you is an important aspect of your life and relationships. If you find yourself constantly pushing people away and sabotaging your relationships, it&#8217;s time to look into why this behavior feels natural to you. Once you understand yourself and your reactions, it will be easier to form the relationships you really want and deserve.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If you think your lack of healthy relationships comes from a place of fear, check out some of the signs you&#8217;re sabotaging your relationships. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":19086,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[884,891,898],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19082","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice","category-relationship-advice","category-relationship-problems"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>6 Signs That You Have a Fear of Intimacy<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" 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