{"id":19353,"date":"2019-10-15T10:00:28","date_gmt":"2019-10-15T17:00:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=19353"},"modified":"2021-05-31T08:31:45","modified_gmt":"2021-05-31T15:31:45","slug":"mature-love-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/love\/mature-love-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Mature Love: 11 Telltale Signs You’ve Found It"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Unlike the fast and hard love of our youth, mature love seems slow and unexciting.  But it\u2019s not. It\u2019s the kind of love that knows what it wants and leads to relationships or ends in breakups, but at the very least, it\u2019s decisive. Cherlyn Chong, a breakup recovery and dating expert, defines mature love as \u201ca slow, gradual warm glow within you when you think of the other person. It\u2019s a love that\u2019s kind, understanding and stable, not explosive and obsessive\u201d. It\u2019ll eventually include your collective experiences which will serve as the bedrock for your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you think your current relationship is a mature love?  Here are some telltale signs it is.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It feels easy and comforting.<\/b>
\n<\/span>\u201cIt\u2019s easy from the  start and easy years later. Both people are emotionally stable, and from that, are able to cultivate genuine respect and trust for one another. The comfort lasts much longer than passion,\u201d says Chong. This is why a mature couple is more likely to outlast an immature couple. Passion can fade over time, but that deep connection and comfort will not.<\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>You still have your space.<\/b>
\n<\/span>Without the obsession and jealousy that often plague younger relationships, mature love gives people their space. Chong says, \u201cthere is room to grow, and mature love doesn\u2019t block, criticize or dampen that progress. It only encourages people to become their very best.\u201d  Nobody feels threatened by being their own person.  <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/b>You have similar life goals.<\/b>  <\/span>
\n<\/span>Immature lovers may not share common goals, beliefs and values.  Resonant life paths are often indicat<\/span>ive of deeper life values, explains licensed clinical professional counselor and relationship therapist, Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin.<\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>You’ve been able to overcome obstacles.<\/b>
\n<\/span>\u201cIt’s great when you feel good, but when the going gets tough and you have an argument or hurdle to climb, can you get through it successfully and still remain together?\u201d asks relationship therapist Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin. In immature relationships, it may be tougher to get through the hard times together. An essential component of mature relationships is the ability to work through tough conversations.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is balance.<\/b>  <\/span>
\n<\/span>\u201cIn a mature relationship there is a healthy balance between the relationship and other factors in one’s life. In this type of relationship, a person will care to meet their own needs as much as they want to meet their partner’s needs,\u201d says licensed relationship counselor, Charese Josie.  \u201cThe love\/relationship focuses on meeting each other’s goals, needs, and responsibilities as they nurture the relationship.\u201d <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>Arguments are healthy.
\n<\/b>This means both parties are open to having hard discussions without name-calling, slamming doors, hanging up the phone. There are definitely no break-up to make-up situations, says Josie.  \u201cMature love wants to continue the relationship without risk of losing it permanently.\u201d <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>There is respect.
\n<\/b>\u201cThis is deeper than someone being nice or romantic periodically. Mature love entails a respect that covers all levels of an adult relationship and is consistent. This includes respecting your partner’s career goals, your partner’s relationship with their children, caring and embracing your partner’s hobbies and self-care activities and supporting your partner’s other relationships that add value to their life,\u201d says Josie.   <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>Does not leave you guessing.<\/b>
\n<\/span>Josie says, \u201cOne knows exactly how the relationship is defined and the goals of the relationship. This type of relationship has open and clear communication and the behavior supports the discussion.\u201d  There are no games.<\/span>
\n<\/span> <\/span>
\n<\/span>You\u2019re open and honest with each other.<\/b>
\n<\/b>If you and your partner have an open line of communication, you\u2019re more likely to avoid the pitfalls that could foil a relationship,\u201d says Ann Feister, a relationship expert.  \u201cOpen and honest communication is the single most important factor in relationships.  Being honest doesn\u2019t just mean not lying, it means telling your partner how you are feeling.\u201d  You no longer have to suppress your feelings, in any circumstance. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>You\u2019re patient with each other.
\n<\/b>\u201cA partner who understands that you\u2019re not perfect but doesn\u2019t hold it against you is a sign that you\u2019re in a mature love relationship. As all humans do, we will stumble in life. A partner who is there to pick you up when you fall is the kind of partner you will want to hold onto,\u201d says Feister.  <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>You build each other up.
\n<\/b>A sign of a mature love is one that aims to help both parties become their highest selves. \u201cBeing able to put aside one\u2019s own ambitions to focus on your partner is a huge sign of commitment and compassion. People who can put themselves and their interests second when needed are partners who are participating in a mature love bond,\u201d says Feister.  <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s like the experts say, there\u2019s a lot to like about a mature love. There are many signs you\u2019ve found it, but awareness and mutual respect are the dead giveaways. So when you\u2019ve found those, it\u2019s a connection you want to hold onto.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mature love isn’t as fiery, but it’s more durable, more real.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":19354,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[987],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19353","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nMature Love: 11 Telltale Signs You've Found It<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Mature love is something special and, as you might've guessed, is hard to find, especially when you're young. 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