{"id":20447,"date":"2021-03-15T09:28:53","date_gmt":"2021-03-15T16:28:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/datemixstaging.wpengine.com\/?p=20447"},"modified":"2022-05-23T23:40:15","modified_gmt":"2022-05-24T06:40:15","slug":"how-to-be-a-man","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-men\/how-to-be-a-man\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Be A Man That Women Want, Respect, And Even Love"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Once upon a time, being a man meant bringing home the bacon, being able to change a tire, and fighting to protect your family.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Today, the definition of \u201chow to be a man\u201d is a little more fuzzy. In fact, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.washingtonpost.com\/lifestyle\/2020\/04\/13\/pushing-against-gender-roles-now-that-were-all-home-together\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">gender roles<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> seem to be more of a personal preference and the things that would once deem you manly are now a turn off to some women.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, how do you be the type of man that women want?<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, there\u2019s no one size fits all answer to this question, as different women want different things. And of course, what constitutes as husband material may be completely different in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/lov\/local-dating\/dating-in-los-angeles\/\" data-type=\"URL\" data-id=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/lov\/local-dating\/dating-in-los-angeles\/\">Los Angeles, California<\/a> vs. in Mobile, Alabama.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, there are a few <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-men\/what-women-want-in-a-relationship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">core principles that women tend to be attracted<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to across the board. So, here\u2019s how to be a man that women want, respect, and even love.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>How to be a Man: Learn who you are and what you want, then own it&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Before diving into another relationship, spend some time learning more about you. Assess what you value, what makes you happy, what doesn\u2019t serve you, etc. There\u2019s nothing sexier than a man who knows who he is, what he wants, and what he doesn\u2019t.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of trying to be the Prince Charming that you think will attract women, be unapologetically who you are.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re only looking for a sexual partner right now, be honest about that. If you want a relationship but know that you\u2019re introverted and need a lot of alone time, be honest about that as soon as you start dating someone.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not only will this prevent relationship problems down the line, but it also helps you find women who want you for you, not the door-holding, sweet-talking, sweater-wearing guy that you were pretending to be in hopes of winning her over.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, owning who you are doesn\u2019t mean stubbornly holding onto your negative qualities rather than working on them. It\u2019s one thing to tell a dating partner that you like to drink on the weekends with your boys to decompress, it\u2019s another to tell a dating partner that you have a drinking problem and she\u2019s going to have to accept that if she wants to date you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Get curious about why you are the way you are, and why you tend to fall into the same patterns with your dating life. It may help to speak to a licensed therapist to really get deep into what makes you, you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you understand yourself, it\u2019s much easier to find a partner who understands you. And having a partner who truly understands you is one of the best parts of being in love.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Be the kind of man who can take care of things (or, of a woman)<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Shifting gender roles have allowed us to re-evaluate who needs to be the breadwinner, who\u2019s in charge of cooking, and who should do the child-rearing.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, whether biologically or not, most women still crave a man that can take care of them in some way. This doesn\u2019t have to mean financially, even though <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/digest.bps.org.uk\/2019\/03\/13\/a-new-study-supports-evolutionary-psychologys-explanation-for-why-men-and-women-want-different-attributes-in-partners\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">many studies <\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">still show that women prefer mates with good earning capacity.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead, think of it more as being a man who can think on his feet, be resourceful, and have a plan B.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> For example, let\u2019s say you\u2019re on a road trip and you drive over something sharp that punctures a wheel. Can you change a tire? Great! But if you can\u2019t, can you quickly call AAA and describe to them where you are and what you need? Can you have a positive attitude while you two wait for the repairman? Can you calm your partner down if she\u2019s stressed about being late to the wedding you were headed to?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to be a man doesn\u2019t have to mean being able to change a tire. But, I think most women can agree that what they look for in a man is someone who can take it in stride when things go wrong. <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the above scenario, a woman could absolutely change the tire, call AAA, and even calm herself down if she\u2019s stressed. But, many women feel like they\u2019re always in charge of doing damage control and would love to date a man who can take care of things from time to time.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Work with your anger (and testosterone), not against it&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s a stereotype that women are overly emotional and men are overly angry, but in reality, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.fatherly.com\/love-money\/how-to-be-a-man-update-ideas-masculinity\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">studies<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> have shown that both men and women are equally emotional. The difference is that both genders tend to express emotions in different ways. Women are generally more comfortable crying or showing vulnerability, where many men may choose to punch a hole in the wall or yell.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, these are all generalizations and every individual is different. If you\u2019re a man who tends to get angry, the solution isn\u2019t to completely repress your emotions and your anger. Instead, find a healthy way to channel your anger, perhaps in martial arts or some form of exercise, in a creative pursuit like painting or drumming, or whatever feels right to you and doesn\u2019t harm others.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Simultaneously, work on being more in touch with your emotions as a way to diffuse the build-up of anger or negative feelings.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Being vulnerable can be incredibly sexy to a woman when done with confidence and openness. If you\u2019re feeling lonely and want to see the women you\u2019re dating? Tell her that. Not only will your needs get met, but your partner will likely be honored that you can open up to her and that she gets a chance to take care of you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course, a woman is much more likely to want to take care of you if you\u2019ve shown her that you can do the same for her.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When it comes to sex, apply the same principles as above. Do not feel ashamed of your desires, fantasies, or kinks. Be open to exploring so that you can learn what really turns you on.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Take time to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-women\/what-intimacy-means-to-a-man\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">form an intimate connection<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> with someone so that you can truly open up in bed. Trust me, that\u2019s exactly what will keep a woman coming back (and also, the other kind of coming).&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How to be a man doesn\u2019t mean sleeping with the largest amount of women possible, it means being a sexual being that pleases his partner before, during, and after intercourse. Someone who isn\u2019t scared to cuddle or do something \u201cunmanly\u201d surrounding sex if that\u2019s what really turns him on.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And of course, one who knows how to communicate.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Read the room, and learn to work all kinds of rooms&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.forbes.com\/sites\/victorlipman\/2016\/03\/11\/new-study-shows-women-consistently-outperform-men-in-emotional-intelligence\/?sh=6ebdf134335d\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Studies have shown<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> that women tend to be far more emotionally intelligent than men.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This may be the reason why more often than not, it\u2019s women wondering why men won\u2019t \u201ctake a hint.\u201d&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to learn how to be a man that women respect and admire, learn to read the room, read a woman\u2019s signs, and adjust accordingly.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re still working on reading a woman\u2019s signs, simply just ask.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There\u2019s nothing wrong with asking, \u201chey, are you still interested in going out with me? If not I totally understand.\u201d Or, if you\u2019re already in a situationship, asking something like, \u201cI know we just started dating and I don\u2019t want to cross any boundaries, so I want to know what you\u2019re comfortable with sexually if you don\u2019t mind sharing.\u201d&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other side of this coin, every woman wants a man that can blend into any situation. In fact, I\u2019d argue that both men and women want a partner that can do equally well by their side at a high-end business dinner, their best friend\u2019s midwestern wedding, or on a rugged vacation gone wrong.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How do you become this type of person?&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Explore, meet new people, try new things, travel, and get yourself into novel situations.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">With experience comes social awareness and emotional intelligence. And with emotional intelligence comes healthier, happier, and more harmonious relationships.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><b>Be the best man you can be&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While I can\u2019t tell you what the cute barista at your coffee shop wants in a man, I can tell you that the happier you are with yourself, the more likely you are to attract Ms. Right (or just Ms. Right Now). <\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Instead of focusing on how to be a man that women want, try focusing on simply bettering yourself and your current relationships, even if this just means your relationships with friends, family, and with yourself. There\u2019s always more learning and improvement to do, and the right woman will swoon over a man who pushes himself to be better every day.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re looking for some more reason on this topic, you might want to check out <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Love-Men-Vision-Mindful-Masculinity\/dp\/1250196248\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For The love of Men: From Toxic to a More Mindful Masculinity<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Future-Men-Trial\/dp\/1941758657\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Future of Men: Masculinity In the 21st Century<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Some home truths on manliness today! <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":183,"featured_media":20448,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[885,997],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20447","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice-men","category-love-advice"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How To Be A Man That Women Want, Respect, And Even Love<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How to be man that women respect has changed from the outddated ideas of the 50s. 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She has written for many international outlets including Bustle, VICE, &amp; Galore. She's currently doing the whole digital nomad thing, but you can find her in Washington D.C. or NYC every once in a while. 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