{"id":29069,"date":"2022-04-25T06:42:17","date_gmt":"2022-04-25T13:42:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/?p=29069"},"modified":"2024-04-09T13:53:06","modified_gmt":"2024-04-09T20:53:06","slug":"adhd-and-relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/relationship-advice\/healthy-relationships\/adhd-and-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"ADHD And Relationships: How You Can Make It Work"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">All relationships require work to thrive. This can be a challenge at the best of times. Throw in one, or both, of the partners having ADHD, and the challenge starts to become even more daunting. This can quickly feel like a significant strain on a partnership.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However, coping with the prospect of ADHD and relationships doesn\u2019t have to be as daunting as you first think. By understanding what ADHD is, the effects it can have on your relationship, and some coping strategies to deal with it, you\u2019ll have the opportunity to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/love-advice\/how-to-build-a-relationship\/\">build a happier, healthier, and longer-lasting connection with your partner<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, what exactly is ADHD, how does it show up in relationships, and what can you both do to minimize its effects on your partnership? We\u2019ve tackled all this, and more, below!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What Is ADHD?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, or ADHD, is a mental health condition that typically affects a person&#8217;s self-regulation and self-control, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthline.com\/health\/adhd\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">causing unusual levels of hyperactive, impulsive behavior<\/a>. Self-regulation and self-control are behaviors we commonly use to interact with others, which is why ADHD and relationships can be tricky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthline.com\/health\/adhd\/three-types-adhd\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">three main types of ADHD<\/a>:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Inattentive type: <\/strong>Usually involves trouble following instructions, focusing, and finishing tasks.<\/li><li><strong>Hyperactive-impulsive type: <\/strong>Typically shown through hyperactive and impulsive behavior like fidgeting or interrupting.<\/li><li><strong>Combined type:<\/strong> This is the most common type of ADHD and is shown through a display of symptoms from the inattentive and the hyperactive type.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Are You Dating Someone With ADHD? Signs to Look Out For<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Spotting and diagnosing ADHD isn\u2019t always straightforward. While it\u2019s more common among children, around <a href=\"https:\/\/chadd.org\/for-adults\/overview\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">ten million adults in the US have ADHD<\/a>. There are some ways that it can show up in a relationship and a few signs that you can look out for which may indicate the presence of ADHD in a partner. We\u2019ve laid these out below.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Inattention:<\/strong> They appear to lose focus during a conversation or mindlessly agree to things that they later forget.<\/li><li><strong>Forgetfulness:<\/strong> Even when they\u2019re paying attention, they still forget what you talked about together.<\/li><li><strong>Impulsivity: <\/strong>They interrupt you during conversations or blurt out their thoughts and opinions without thinking about how their words will affect you.\u00a0<\/li><li><strong>Disorganization: <\/strong>They struggle to stay organized, whether it\u2019s getting things done around the house, tidying up after themselves, or staying in control of their time.\u00a0<\/li><li><strong>Explosive temper:<\/strong> They struggle to regulate their emotions which often leads to angry outbursts.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How Does ADHD Affect Relationships?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ADHD can affect a relationship in several different ways. Affects will also be felt differently depending on whether it\u2019s you or your partner with ADHD. However, there are some common trends to look out for. Below, we\u2019ve laid these out in more detail.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>If you\u2019re the one with ADHD<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s common to feel like you\u2019re constantly being criticized or nagged by your partner. Nothing you do feels good enough, which can lead to you avoiding your partner altogether, or saying anything to get them to leave you alone. You would love your partner to ease up a little, relax, and not feel the need to control everything all the time.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>If you\u2019re <\/strong><strong>dating someone with ADHD<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You might feel lonely, ignored, unappreciated, and regularly hurt by your partner\u2019s actions and behavior. Sometimes it feels like you\u2019re not a team, and you\u2019re the only responsible adult holding things together. You can\u2019t rely on your partner, and it\u2019s tiring having to constantly remind them about things that you often end up doing them yourself instead.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">ADHD and Relationships: 6 Coping Mechanisms to Try<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you have ADHD or are dating someone with ADHD, there are some steps you can take to improve your relationship and make it work. Below, we\u2019ve put together six of our top suggestions.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>1. Educate yourself and your partner<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">First things first, it\u2019s important to understand what it is you\u2019re dealing with. Do some deeper research into ADHD so that you can better understand the condition. The more that you and your partner are aware of the symptoms and how to best manage them, the better you\u2019ll both feel when conflicts arise.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The internet can be great when it comes to researching pretty much any topic. But, be sure to use a trusted and accredited resource, like <a href=\"https:\/\/chadd.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit\/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD)<\/a>, and avoid unverified content.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>2. Understand how symptoms affect the relationship<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A person with ADHD can often feel inadequate, anxious, ashamed, and misunderstood. Their partner might also feel disrespected, unheard, ignored, and over-burdened.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you both understand how ADHD affects the other person in the relationship, you\u2019ll then be able to spot problems and patterns as they arise. This awareness is the first step to resolving these issues.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>3. See things from the other person\u2019s point of view<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When one or both sides of the relationship feel frustrated or misunderstood, it can easily lead to arguments and even spiral into a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/love\/what-is-a-love-hate-relationship-and-is-it-good-for-you\/\">love-hate relationship<\/a>. To avoid this, try and maintain perspective and empathize with your partner.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ask them how they\u2019re feeling and listen to what they say without interrupting. When they\u2019re done, repeat back what you\u2019ve heard and check you\u2019ve understood. Reflect on what came up during your conversation together and use this to move forward and resolve the issue.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>4. Develop positive strategies<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There isn\u2019t a magic solution when it comes to ADHD and relationships. But, there are some steps you can take to reduce the severity of the symptoms.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This includes taking prescribed medication from your doctor, engaging in another form of therapy, getting enough exercise each day, eating a balanced diet, practicing positive interactions, and becoming more aware of your triggers. Try these out to discover which strategies work best for you and your partner.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>5. Work on communication skills<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So many issues in relationships are the result of poor communication. And when someone has ADHD, it makes communication even more challenging. You may slip into a parent-child dynamic where the non-ADHD partner feels like they\u2019re always looking after the ADHD partner.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Here are some strategies to help you communicate more effectively with your partner:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Say \u201cI\u201d when sharing how you feel to avoid placing blame.<\/li><li>Communicate face to face, so you can see each other\u2019s body language and expressions.<\/li><li>Maintain eye contact.<\/li><li>Repeat what you\u2019ve heard to make sure you\u2019re both clear.<\/li><li>Ask questions.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>6. Seek professional help<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you\u2019re struggling, don\u2019t be afraid to seek professional help sooner rather than later. ADHD undoubtedly makes relationships more challenging, but finding solutions to the problems you\u2019re encountering will significantly improve the health of your relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Work Together With Your Partner as a Team<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ADHD and romantic relationships can be tricky to deal with. Whether it\u2019s you or your partner with ADHD, there will certainly be challenges that lie ahead. But, the key thing is to face these challenges together as a team.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By working together and understanding the views, feelings, and concerns of your partner, you\u2019ll be able to create strategies for coping with ADHD in your relationship. In the end, this extra support and understanding that you both create together can actually <a href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/relationship-advice\/healthy-relationships\/what-makes-a-good-relationship\/\">make your relationship better<\/a>, stronger, happier, and longer-lasting.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>All relationships require work to thrive. This can be a challenge at the best of times. Throw in one, or both, of the partners having ADHD, and the challenge starts to become even more daunting. This can quickly feel like a significant strain on a partnership.&nbsp; However, coping with the prospect of ADHD and relationships [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":141,"featured_media":30630,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[894,891],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29069","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-healthy-relationships","category-relationship-advice"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>ADHD And Relationships: How You Can Make It Work<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Are you dating someone with ADHD? This can be challenging, but there are several ways to make ADHD and relationships work. Here&#039;s how!\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/relationship-advice\/healthy-relationships\/adhd-and-relationships\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"ADHD And Relationships: How You Can Make It Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Are you dating someone with ADHD? This can be challenging, but there are several ways to make ADHD and relationships work. 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Ask her what she does for a living, and she\u2019ll tell you she holds a mirror to your soul, so you can see how beautiful you already are. Shani is a bestselling author and internationally published writer. Her articles have reached and touched millions, while her books have made their way into the hands and hearts of thousands of women worldwide. You can also find some of her work at SilverSingles and EliteSingles. 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