{"id":7184,"date":"2014-12-24T09:35:03","date_gmt":"2014-12-24T17:35:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/about.zoosk.com\/en\/?p=7184"},"modified":"2021-10-29T02:39:32","modified_gmt":"2021-10-29T09:39:32","slug":"advice-how-do-i-get-him-to-approach-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zoosk.com\/date-mix\/dating-advice\/dating-advice-women\/advice-how-do-i-get-him-to-approach-me\/","title":{"rendered":"How Do I Get Him to Approach Me?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Dear Joan Actually,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m constantly putting myself out there, but no one ever approaches me. I’m trying all sorts of new venues and parties, but it seems like all my friends get approached over me. I have no idea what’s wrong with me, because I would consider myself relatively attractive. Striking up a conversation with a random stranger gives me so much anxiety. How do I get him to approach me without looking desperate?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The best way to get him to approach you is to send out the right signals. Whereas you’re wondering “What’s wrong with me? No one is approaching me”, he’s busy wondering, “What should I say to her?” This cycle will persist until one of you makes a move; help him make that move with some flirting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Although it might feel desperate or contrived to act a bit suggestive, it’s not; it’s just your way of extending him an invitation to approach you. Flirting the right way will accomplish two things: 1. show him that rejection is unlikely and 2., make it easier for him to pursue you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Up your flirt game by trying the following:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Make eye contact and keep open body language<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When someone interests you, make eye contact for a couple seconds and look away. If he looks back at you a second time, you\u2019ve made an initial connection. Now, take out your headphones and put away your phone. He\u2019ll be more likely to approach you, if he doesn\u2019t feel like he\u2019s interrupting something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Consider where you\u2019re standing<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re standing with a group of women, you’re giving him another reason NOT to approach you. Try to break away from the pack or, at the very least, stand off to the side so he\u2019ll be able to talk to you without feeling like he’s addressing a crowd.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Keep open conversation <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When he does approach you, avoid conversation topics that are one sided. So, don\u2019t bring up your sister\u2019s cold or talk about your new lipstick; he won\u2019t have any input for you. Go with topics that will help you establish common ground as quickly as possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stick with things everyone has an opinion about–travel, food, movies, or music. A lot of men talk themselves out of approaching women because they can’t figure out what to say; throwing him a conversational softball will make things a lot easier for both of you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Give him a reason to contact you<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you’re feeling chemistry, shift the conversation to a place that makes extending an invite or exchanging contact information natural and easy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Examples: <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Food: \u201cI just don’t know if I can believe your pizza place is better than Tony’s\u201d (You’re giving him a reason to invite you out to pizza.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Music: \u201cHow did you get tickets to that show? You have to let me know if you come across an extra.\u201d (You’re giving him a reason to ask for your number.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ultimately, your movements and behavior should be reassuring and inviting. Showing that you’re receptive through smiling, casual touching, and staying engaged in conversation will help you get approached and asked out on a date.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Four flirting tips to get a guy to approach you. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":37,"featured_media":12206,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[886,974,895],"tags":[768,777,566,589],"class_list":["post-7184","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dating-advice-women","category-flirting","category-meeting-people","tag-joanactually","tag-meeting","tag-video","tag-women"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nAsk Joan: How Do I Get Him to Approach Me?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The best way to get him to approach you is to send out the right signals. 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