We New Yorkers know what it’s like to compete for things. For jobs, apartments, reservations at the best restaurants, and, of course, parking. In a place where single women outnumber men by over 200,000 a gal has to play hard ball for a man. So, if you’re looking for love in the new year and want results, sharpen those stilettos and get ready to date like a New Yorker.
Step 1: Strategize.
Dating is a numbers game. The more you date, the greater your chances of meeting the one. That means you need to date three times a week. This will get you into dating mode fast. One date a week is simply not enough—You need to get your momentum going, so don’t be too picky when you start out. This will also force you to be a better conversationalist, which means you need to be informed and ready to speak about a variety of subjects.
To accomplish this:
Read up on all major newspapers and don’t forget sections you may not normally check out. Trust me, knowing about what’s happening in the cosmos has made me shine a little brighter.
Come armed with different types of personal cards that aren’t your business card. Charming, funny, intriguing, mysterious—personal cards are like little stories. Get yourself some and hand them out liberally at social events.
Overhaul your online persona. Include a fun bio, what your family and friends say about you, and likes and dislikes. Lots of people will check out your Facebook page or other social profiles to learn more about you before going on a date, so make sure you’re well represented.
Step 2: Get your team in place.
Now that you’ve got your game plan, assemble your friends and family to execute the next three months like it’s a war. Find a coach who can keep your spirits high and act as a sounding board. Find a gym friend to help you step it up, since you’re going to need to be in top condition for all the wining and dining. Get a savvy hair and make-up friend to give you some pro tips. (Also, YouTube has great free videos for this you should check out.) And when you see another woman that looks great, ask her what she does. Flattery gets you everywhere.
Step 3: Start making moves.
Once you have everything in place, it’s time to kick up your game to the next level and start meeting people. Other than the usual, bars and hot spots try a few of these advanced moves to find the one for you:
Girl on The Move. Have a party and invite twice as many men as women. Then, have a theme. For example, a vacation theme designed to help you figure out where to go on your next vacation. This will give men the opportunity to chat you up about all the great places they’ve been. It is also very telling what kind of men they are. Cultured, beach boy, or urban trekker.
Wing Woman. I had a friend who likes firemen. She knew this about herself but it never occurred to her to strategize about it. So, I did it for her. I went to the local fire station and stated my business. I asked if any firemen were single and wanted to meet my friend—I described her as blonde, funny, charming, then I gave a short description and waited. The captain was a little taken back but asked around and then told me to come back Saturday when the single guys work. Boom!
Meet the Mom. If you find someone you’re really interested in, find a way to meet his mother ASAP. The way to the altar is through her. Find out as much about her as you can. Is she part of some kind of club that sponsors events? How fortunate would it be for you to casually meet and form an alliance? Like a boss.
Watch out 2018—we’re dating here! Uptown, downtown, and we’re taking the express line.