How to Prove You Love Someone Through Thoughtfulness

A man who wants to know how to prove you love someone, kissing his girlfriend at twilight.

We’ve all heard that love is an action, so it’s important to do things for your partner that show how much you love them instead of just saying those three little words. But when you’re busy with your everyday life, it’s hard to come up with sweet things to do or to know exactly how you should prove you love for someone. The truth is, showing someone you care, isn’t as hard as you may think. Implementing these strategies can go a long way towards proving your love for your partner and ensuring that your bond stays strong, even through the toughest of times. 

Here are just a few of the things you can do to thoughtfully show your partner you love them:

Actively listen.
In a world where we have our phones on us at all times, it can be easy to scroll through social media sites or text friends while you’re spending time with your partner. Silencing your phone and putting it down while your partner is telling you about their day shows them that they’re your priority and that you care about what they’re sharing with you.

Another important part of actively listening means not trying to fix your partner’s problems. Your partner is equipped to figure out what they need to do about an issue, and they may just need to vent. Give them the space to, and if they need feedback, know they’ll ask you for it.

Make time for them.
Once again, we all want to feel like we’re our partner’s priority. Even if it’s just 15 minutes at the end of the day or scheduling a date night, let your partner know you care by reserving that time for them.

Appreciate them.
If your partner takes out the garbage, makes your lunch, or drives the kids to their sports practice every week make sure to thank them for it. Even though it’s easy to take something like your everyday division of duties for granted, we all love appreciation for the little things. Sending a quick text like, “I know you hate taking out the garbage, but thanks so much for doing it every week!” or, “Thanks so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to make sure the kids get to baseball!” can go a long way towards ensuring your partner knows you appreciate them and all the things they do for you and your family.

Compliment them.
Make an effort to compliment your partner. Little things like “Your butt looks great in those jeans,” or, “I’m so proud of you for working out lately. You look really great!” can make someone’s day. If you had a particularly difficult conversation one morning, it can also let them know you still appreciate them if you send them a quick little text like, “Hey beautiful. I know this morning was tough, but I hope you have a great day!”

Touch them.
When you’re drained after running around after kids all day or trying to decompress after a difficult day at work, it might be the last thing on your mind to hold your partner’s hand or hug them. You might actually just want to mumble “‘night” before you head to bed, but physical affection releases feel-good hormones. These have been proven to inspire connection and closeness and reduce stress and anxiety. So instead of breezing by them to head to bed, take a moment to cuddle up.

Have sex.
Touch and sex don’t necessarily go hand in hand, but they both release those same feel-good hormones. They also let your partner know that you still find them attractive and desirable, no matter how much time has passed. Even a quick roll in the sack can give you an increase in dopamine and a reminder of how passionately you feel about each other.

Lighten their load.
Maybe your partner has been stressing over a difficult presentation at work or taking a meal every night to a sick relative. Maybe you know they hate doing dishes, yet they never forget to do them. Try to take over one of their domestic chores. It’s a nice gesture and shows that you care.

Make or pick up their favorite meal or snack.
We all have our favorite comfort foods, and sometimes the key to our hearts is through our stomachs. Picking up their favorite meal from their favorite restaurant when you’re on your way home or making them that pumpkin pie from their mother’s recipe can make sure their belly and hearts are full.

Give them time to themselves.
While you may not have trouble expressing that you need some time to yourself, your honey may not. Suggest that they take some time to hang out with their friends, go to the gym, play video games, read a book, or just sleep in. This shows that you care about them taking care of themselves and want a partner who is their best self.

Ask for their advice.
When you’re dealing with an issue, like how to approach your boss for a raise, asking your partner for advice shows you trust and value their judgment and opinion and that their feedback matters to you.

Be their biggest supporter.
If your partner is working hard for a promotion or has a dream they aren’t yet brave enough to pursue, be supportive of their aspirations with your words and actions. Offer to help if you have a skill they may need. Let them bounce their ideas off of you. Sit down and work through a budget if they need to take a pay cut to start in a new career field, leave their job, or go back to school. If they do something really great, put a little picture of them and what they did on your own social media page. By encouraging and supporting them and their goals, you can show them that you care about their happiness as well.

Be spontaneous.
Surprise your partner with tickets to see their favorite sports team, a concert, a special exhibit, or a mini-vacation, or a present that you know they’d been saving up to buy themselves. It shows you know what interests them and that you pay attention to what makes them happy. Plus, nothing is better than seeing their face light up when you surprise them.

These are just a few of the things you can do to show through your actions that you love your partner. Adding one or two of these into your daily routine can help you stay connected and in love for years to come.

Tara Mae Mulroy

Tara Mae Mulroy is a freelance writer and blogger who focuses on relationships. She is a regular contributor on Medium as well as the author of the full-length poetry collection, Swallow, and other writing found at taramaemulroy.com.

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