A woman who is 40 and single getting some coffee from a man.

Holidays are most enjoyable when you have a partner or spouse to celebrate with, along with a handful of children. However, they can be difficult when you’re single and alone. But sitting back feeling depressed or dwelling on how miserable you are won’t get you anywhere. There’s always somebody out there that, yes, has it better than you, but there is also somebody out there that has it worse. Making the best of the holidays is sometimes easier said than done, but here are some tips that will help you make the most of the holidays when you’re looking to meet over 40 singles.

1. Shopping at the Mall
If you’re out buying gifts, this might be the perfect opportunity to do a little flirting. If you happen to see someone alone, without a ring on, who happens to attract your eye, why not ask their advice on that sweater for Dad or that perfume for Mom? What better way to break the ice and start a conversation. Even when you’re waiting in those endless lines to pay, spark up a conversation with the person in front or behind you.

2. Holiday Travel
When you arrive at the airport and your flight is inevitably delayed, scope out the restaurant and airport bar and grab a drink or a bite next to someone whom you think might be single. Also, chat up people while you’re waiting to board your flight or someone sitting next to you in the plane. They may not be single, but if you start a conversation and they know you are, you never know who they know.

3. The Office Holiday Party
Many people choose not to go to their work holiday party because they don’t have a date or just find them boring. If you work for a large organization, I’m sure you don’t know everyone who works there, so going to the holiday party might be a great opportunity to get to know more people. Even if people are bringing a date, you might meet a couple who happens to have a perfect person in mind for you. Just remember the two drink rule. You don’t want to go home with the wrong person or end up in the closet making out with your boss!

4. Family and Friend Holiday Gatherings
Your family and friend gatherings may seem like an odd place to meet someone new. You may think you know everyone there, and that there’s no chance of meeting anyone new. But, once again, you never know whether a relative will show up who you haven’t seen for ages and who has a friend whose son or daughter got divorced last year and is looking for someone new.

5. Holiday Hot Toddies
Getting out during the holidays for a hot toddy or holiday drink is always a good way to de-stress after hours of shopping and wrapping gifts. It’s enticing to want to stay indoors, drinking hot cocoa and watching holiday movies by yourself, but get your butt up and go out and mingle! Get in the spirit and say “Happy Holidays” to everyone you meet and perhaps a conversation will start.

Three of the men whom I’ve had serious relationships with, I met between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve. I think even though some people are down in the dumps during the holidays, they’re also looking for a fresh start heading into the New Year. Many people love the holidays and look at them as an opportunity to spread cheer and create new relationships with an optimistic attitude. They want to start the New Year off right with a new love. Why don’t you become one of them?


To read more of Tonia’s work and learn about her upcoming memoir, visit toniadecosimo.com or follower her on Twitter at @ToniaDeCosimo.

Tonia DeCosimo

Author on Dating and Relationships

Tonia, a successful entrepreneur, received her B.S. degree in Elementary Education and English from Manhattan College. Her career path, however, took her into the fields of marketing, publishing, and sales consulting in which she has worked successfully for the past 25 years. During that time, she has built and managed several companies including her own.

When she’s not busy building her career or dishing out dating advice, Tonia is the proud step-mom of two teenagers, resides on Long Island with her husband.

To read more of Tonia’s work and learn about her book Single and Not Settling, visit toniadecosimo.com or follower her on Twitter at @ToniaDeCosimo.