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11 Tips for Fun, Flirty and Effective First Date Conversation

Attractive couple enjoying a fun first date conversation

First date conversations can be quite tricky. You want to be fun and flirty, but don’t want to come across as arrogant or needy. We have you covered. Here’re eleven easy tips to help get you on the way to top-notch first date conversation. Paying attention to a few simple pointers can give you the confidence to relax, chat away and make a great first impression.

1. Be Upfront About the Feels

Almost everyone on the planet gets nervous about a first date conversation. You’re not alone.  If you’re feeling a little nervous, just be upfront and admit this to your date. It can be a great icebreaker and will help you both feel more comfortable.

2. Show Interest

It’s always a good idea to show interest in the other person, especially during first date conversation. People love to talk about themselves and usually have interesting stories to share if you’re interested. It also takes the pressure off you, if you’re feeling a little shy.

3. Ask About Their Faves

Everyone loves talking about their favorites, be it bands, bars or TV shows. Asking your date questions about their favorite things in life will help the conversation flow smoothly. You might discover that you both even share the same, and that’s a solid reason to keep a good thing going.

4. Pause on Getting too Personal

It’s natural to want to share all the information about your life with your new date. But, you don’t want to give away too many personal details immediately. Wait until you get to know the person better before discussing more private topics. Try keep first date conversation open but also light-hearted.

5. Avoid the P-Word

Everyone has different political views, and politics can be a very touchy subject these days. You’ll want to avoid this altogether, unless it comes up naturally. It’s one of the easiest ways to make the conversation turn into a shouting match, and no one wants that.

6. Stick to the Truth

Don’t tell your date you’re a famous musician, if you’re a music teacher. It’s important to be realistic and honest. You’ll want to come across as your best self, but you’ll also want to come across as your authentic self. Your date wants to know you for who you really are, so there is no need to embellish your accomplishments. You’re good enough just the way you are!

7. Keep Finances Off the Table

It’s perfectly acceptable to ask about your date’s job, but it’s quite rude to ask about your love interest’s money matters. You don’t want to come across as someone who only cares about how much money the other person makes.  Have fun and get to know the person instead – there’s much more interesting topics to discuss anyway.

8. Ex’s Are a No Go

Most of us have them, but it’s not a great idea to share a lot of information about your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend as a topic of first date conversation, unless your date brings it up. In this case, it’s your prerogative to say that you don’t want to talk about it yet. This is probably the best decision to make. If you decide to share a bit of information, keep it as brief and objective as possible, and then change the subject. This topic is better covered a little later down the road.

9. Don’t Be a Negative Nelly

Some of us just have a dark and self-deprecating sense of humor, but this can come across as having really low self-esteem to your date. Try to avoid making self-disparaging comments, even if they are only meant to be humorous. You want to put your best foot forward and confidence is a lot more appealing!

10. Keep Cool, Calm and Collected

As much as possible, just try to be in the present moment. Avoid thinking about the future too much and making yourself anxious. Just have fun on this date, and trust that things will work out with this person if they are supposed to. Let things take their natural course, without putting too much pressure or expectations on it.

11. No Phones

Keep your phone in your pocket or bag. Checking your phone and scrolling through social media while on a first date is a real buzz kill. Although it can be tempting to check-in, the best advice is to keep your phone out of sight and focus on the person right in front of you.

Most importantly show up and be you! When approaching a first date conversation, keep positive, ask questions and don’t be afraid to have a laugh together. The right person will want to know more.

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