Social Media Etiquette – What Real Daters Have to Say

A doodle of a chat bubble with a heart.

Online dating is becoming more and more common. New dating sites and apps pop up every week and the number of people who meet online is rising every day. With things moving so fast, it’s hard to keep up with the social norms associated with all the new technology. When is it right to friend someone on Facebook? How much should you share on Twitter? It’s hard to say.

That’s why the online dating site Zoosk conducted a series of surveys with people across the United States about the social media etiquette around sharing romantic moments on sites such as Facebook and Twitter.

Here’s what they found:

Coworkers and Social Sharing Don’t Mix

  • 60% of Americans say they are cautious about posting romantic posts on social media because they are worried about what their coworkers might think.
  • 64% of Americans would be more apt to share romantic relationship updates on social media if they were not Facebook friends with their coworkers.
  • 38% of Americans say they don’t post any relationship or date night photos on social media sites because they’re friends with coworkers

Couples Embrace Technology

  • 81% of couples say they use technology to interact with each other throughout the day.
  • 60% of couples say the primary role of social media in their relationship involves publicly expressing feelings of love or sharing photos/videos or relationship updates with family and friends.

Texting Is More Romantic

  • 78% of Americans would prefer a romantic text vs. an affectionate Facebook post or Tweet.

Women Like to Share About Their Dates

  • 51% of women like to check out their friends’ romantic photos and updates.
  • Only 37% of men like to check out their friends’ romantic photos and updates.

So how do you use this information to your advantage? We asked dating and relationship experts to give their feedback:

  • Don’t Over-Text
    Laurie Davis, founder of eFlirt Expert, says sometimes we mistake the convenience of communication for the availability of our sweetheart. Don’t send more than three back-to-back texts without a response.

  • Share the Love
    Julie Spira, a leading online dating expert, CEO and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert, and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating, says that when a couple changes their relationships status, the cheering squad from friends jumps into high gear with an abundance of likes and messages. 
  • Be Professional
    Julie Spira suggests if you wouldn’t say it in a job interview, don’t post it on Facebook.

  • Get On the Same Page
    Everyone has a different level of comfort with online romance and it’s important to know your partner’s social sharing preferences. Have an open discussion about likes and dislikes, and don’t be offended if your partner doesn’t want to put quite so much out there, says Laurie Davis.

  • Know Your Privacy Settings
    It’s important to utilize privacy settings on sites like Facebook by blocking your coworkers or family members who you’d rather not know everything about your new relationship, advises Laurie Davis.

About the Survey: Data shared in this article comes from three Zoosk surveys conducted online, among users of Zoosk who reside in the United States. A survey in June 2012 fielded responses from more than 1,600 of its members who are in a committed relationship. Surveys in July and August 2012 fielded responses from 3,146 and 1,281 members, respectively, who are single and/or in a committed relationship.

Julie T.

Juliette is a freelance writer with years of experience covering dating and relationships.

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