July 6, International Kissing Day. What does that mean? How do we celebrate Kissing Day? Are we supposed to lock lips with someone special? Do we study kissing techniques? Of is the purpose to increase the overall quantity of smooches?
Do we even need a day to focus on kissing?
To be blunt, the answer is yes. We need to set aside one day to celebrate the kiss because it’s an intimate act that carries so much weight in a relationship. It seems that once people have been in a relationship for a while, most couples’ kissing styles begin to mesh and they find their smooching groove. But, for couples who are new to dating or even for some old timers, a little guidance might be in order to guarantee that there kisses are in top form.
It all starts with cleanliness. You don’t want to go sticking your tongue into someone’s damp cave of halitosis. So if you know there might be a make-out session in your near future, brush your teeth beforehand. If that’s not possible, carry a travel size bottle of Scope, some mints or a stick of gum to freshen and not offend.
I remember kissing a girl in high school after she’d eaten what seemed like a wheel of cheese. It was not a good thing. Don’t be that girl And, while we’re on the subject, fellas, if kissing is in on the horizon, shave so you don’t leave her with a rash from your stubble.
The big question: open or closed? The simple answer: closed…duh. Once you’ve lip-locked, there really isn’t any reason to open your eyes. Keep them closed and enjoy the ride. If you open them and your partner catches you, you run the risk of coming off kind of creepy. But, then again, you just caught them with their eyes open, too. Could be a match made in heaven. I take that back, just do what you want.
Where do you put your hands while you’re kissing? It really depends on your position. Are you standing at a door? Sitting on a sofa? Lying on a bed? If you’re standing, wrapping your arms around your partner and rubbing his or her back is a safe way to go (think slow, sensual strokes). Another safe bet for most any position is placing your hands on the other person’s face (a hand cupping the jaw or lightly touching the cheek). Hands in your pockets? No way!
Once the tongue comes into play with a kiss, you start to open the door to passion. A tongue can really heighten a kiss, but it can also douse the fires of excitement if used improperly. Remember, inch for inch, the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. So, use that power for good, not evil. That means no shoving or forced entry. And, by all means, keep it in the mouth. No one needs you lapping their lips and chin like a Golden Retriever. Use your tongue to tease and seduce, and you’ll be fine.
Celebrate the kiss on July 6th. Smooch goodbye on the cheek. Give a peck on the lips in the morning. Increase the passion a la the French. But, be sure that there’s meaning behind each lip-lock. Have fun.
Leon Scott Baxter is America’s Romance Guru and author of A Labor With Love and Out of the Doghouse and the new book, The Finance of Romance.