Dating In Your 30s As A Woman: The Good, The Bad And The Beautiful

lady walking in the street with balloons showing the perks of dating in your 30s as a woman

Dating is such an interesting experience throughout one’s life. Dating in your teenage years is an entirely different ballgame than dating as an adult. And dating in your 20s is different to dating in your 30s, which is different from dating in your 50s! 

But right now, we’re going to focus on dating in your 30s as a woman. There’s a lot to unpack here, some good, some bad, some great! Let’s get started. 

What There is to Know About Dating in Your 30s as a Woman

The Good: Confidence is Key

A lot of people agree that being in your 30s is a huge step toward being more confident. There’s a major difference between the 20s and 30s. In your 20s, you’re often figuring yourself and your life plans out.

While being in your 30s doesn’t mean you automatically have all of the answers, you likely have a better idea of who you are and what you want. And that, of course, applies to dating too. 

When you know who you are and what you want, dating is going to feel better. You’re likely going to be more sure of yourself in turning down people who’re not a good fit, whereas younger people may be inclined to give everyone a shot. 

What else is great about dating in your 30s as a woman? You know what you like, and we don’t just mean in partners, we mean in hobbies and passions. According to HuffPost, “we don’t need to pretend that we are into things like camping, sports, or certain bands or food the way we may have done in our 20s to try to get a guy to like us.”

As the writer continues, “by our 30s, we learn that we’d like to base and build a relationship on TRUTH, and if the guy doesn’t like who we are, then he’s not the right guy.” 

When dating in your 30s, you’re more likely to say no to people you know you won’t like. And you’re also more likely to say yes to people you do like. And that’s a very good thing. 

The Bad: Am I Too Old For This? 

Just like in all dating circumstances, there’re some bad angles here too. Dating in your 30s as a woman can be great for the aforementioned reasons. But it can also be really tough. 

There’re many societal factors to consider when you’re dating in your 30s, especially as a woman. Women are too often held to high societal standards when it comes to looks and personality.  A woman in her 30s may even be deemed too old for some men to date, even if those men are the same age. Being young is often seen as being carefree, fun and appealing. 

A woman in her 30s may run into issues while dating that she may not have had to deal with when she was younger. If a woman in her 30s has an established career and that is her priority, it may be tougher to find someone to date. A lot of times, people want to date to marry and have kids, and some women in their 30s aren’t looking for that.

Similarly, women in their 30s may have already had a marriage and already have kids. That adds another layer to it, dating with kids! The truth of the matter is that with wisdom, comes life experience and sometimes baggage, and that can be challenging for new relationships. 

The Beautiful: What’s Really Important

Are people pickier when they’re in their 20s or 30s? It’s an interesting topic that’s certainly objective. But according to Psychology Today, “researchers found that older singles were less picky than younger singles.” 

The article goes on to say, “…older singles were less picky about looks, status, and personality. However, one trait stood out as especially unimportant to older singles: The extent to which the partner was approved of by their friends and integrated into their larger social network.” 

It may seem kind of backward to consider someone less picky in their 30s than in their 20s, but it also makes sense. Oftentimes as we get older, we care less about the little things. Looks may be less important when dating in your 30s as a woman, and it may be more about compatibility. 

So one of the best things about dating in your 30s is that the things that really matter are given more weight! It’s not about being picky, but rather now knowing what is actually important. 

All in all, dating can be tough at any age. It’s also incredibly rewarding and fun, even when dating in your 30s as a woman. The most important things to remember is just to be yourself, be confident, and seek out what you want. Regardless if you’re new to dating after a long relationship, or you’ve been dating this whole time, there’s always new dating discoveries to be made. Women in your 30s, happy dating! 

Jessica Tholmer

Freelance Writer

Jess Tholmer has been writing on the internet for what feels like most of her life. After studying English Literature in school, she has leaned into her degree and is a full-time content writer, social media manager, and freelance contributor to websites like HelloGiggles.com. You can find her @tholmz on Twitter and Instagram!

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