What Single Men Want According to Online Dating Data

A woman who figured out what single men want, laughing and kissing her boyfriend’s cheek on the beach.

If you’ve dated for any amount of time, you know that sometimes things can get a little confusing. You’re looking for someone. They’re looking for someone. But if you’re interested in meeting the right guy, the conversation about what single men want doesn’t seem to happen. A lot of stuff goes unsaid, and it can be confusing.

To shed some light on what guys are really looking for, we teamed up with Zoosk, the online dating service, to look into the data behind what men on dating sites want. If you’re looking for some extra insight, here’s what the numbers say:

Men just want to have fun too.
This should be plain obvious, but in a partner men are looking to have fun. Fun and have fun were consistently the most popular words men used to describe their ideal partners across different age groups. Now this doesn’t mean that you won’t have serious or deep moments, it just means that you need to know it only takes the right two people to have a party. Are you half the party?

Honesty is still the best policy.
Honest and caring were two keywords that were mentioned consistently when men described what their partner would look like. Maybe, this shouldn’t come as a surprise, but it’s difficult to have any type of relationship without honesty and affection. Even in casual relationships, it’s still nice to feel cared for by your partner.

Dust off the old joke book.
Turns out single men are looking for someone who can make them laugh. Laugh, humor, and sense of humor were all words that men used to describe the people they like to date. We’ve all told jokes that we knew were funny, but fell flat on a first date. It can be pretty deflating. It’s hard to date someone who doesn’t think you’re funny. The data is in and it says you might want to brush up on your zingers.

Looking for love in all the right places.
Romance is in the air and on the web. Across the profiles we searched, men consistently mentioned they are looking for relationships and someone loving. Romance is around and it’s not going anywhere, anytime soon. If you’re looking for love online and haven’t found it, don’t worry it’s out there. You have the numbers to prove it.

Got brains?
The days of smart shaming are over. Single men are looking for someone who has their wits about them. There’s nothing quite like getting deep into an intellectual conversation with someone who knows how to talk. Intelligent and smart both ranked very highly in common terms single men used to describe their perfect date.

Get ready to meet the family.
A person’s relationship to their family can say a lot, and men agree. Single Zoosk men said that family was something that was important to them and was also important in partners. Kids were also something that men mentioned often, but less often than family. If you’re a family person, then you’re in luck.

Kindness is the greatest virtue of all.
This goes for life and for dating. Men consistently said that they were looking for someone who was nice and kind. This one may seem a bit obvious, but this is a quality that’s often overlooked in the dating world. No need to play games here. Niceness and kindness will take you a long way.

Of course, men aren’t a monolithic group without variation from person to person. You’ll have to mix it up and get personal with whoever you decide to spend your time with. That said, showing off these traits will likely help your luck with all the single men out there waiting to find someone.

Alex Bocknek

Alex Bocknek is the senior editor of The Date Mix and works at Zoosk, the online dating service. He’s also a recovering music critic and an aspiring fiction writer (probably lost) on the way to an independent bookstore near you. He can be found occasionally musing about politics, philosophy, and love in the modern world.

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