So you made it through the awkwardness of the first date. Congrats! As you prepare for date number two you’re probably thinking, “Now what are we going to talk about on a second date?” After all the first date is about hitting all those primo convo topics like, job, family, and what’s on your Netflix queue.
Though you’re still getting to know one another, the second date is about peeling back the layers of your date and digging deeper into who they are, and vice versa. You want to keep things light and interesting, but you also want to keep building momentum and intimacy.
The good new is that second dates should be less nerve-wrecking than the first one (phew!) which means this is a great opportunity to really let your guard down and let your date get to know more about who you are, as well as to show them that you’re someone who they can trust to be more of themselves in front of.
If you’re still scratching your head about what to talk about, here are five things to discuss to avoid those awkward silences.
1. The “Call Back” Topic
Chances are you’ve been chatting with your date back and forth since the first date, which means you can “call back” to something they’ve mentioned to you before. Maybe they talked about an important business meeting they were dreading, or maybe they told you how excited they were about their sister’s upcoming wedding. Talking about something they confided in you shows not only that you were listening and paying attention (bonus points!) but also that you care (double bonus points!).
2. The “Good Memories” Topic
You can still refer to topics you discussed on your first date—like their family or college life—but now that you know each other a bit better, you can dig deeper and ask more probing questions about them. Ideally, you want to stay as positive as possible, which is why asking them, “What’s your favorite memory from your parents’ cabin?” or “What’s a good memory from your travel abroad experience” are good options. You’re keeping things light while also getting to know them better.
3. The “Hopes and Dreams” Topic
Talking about your hopes and dreams not only leads to a fascinating discussion, but it will also reveal more about your date and whether or not your dreams sync up. You can go as deep as “Where do you see yourself in five years?” to “What’s your dream vacation?” This topic will let you know pretty quickly if your date’s goals—or lack thereof—are something you can get onboard with.
4. The “Funniest Thing I Ever Did” Topic
Again, you want to keep things light with the second date. Laughing is a terrific bonding mechanism between two people, which is why you want to bust out “the funniest thing I ever did” story. Share yours first so that your date will feel comfortable sharing theirs. For the most part, you want to stay as PG-rated as possible but if you feel like your date can handle it, then go ahead and tell that raunchy story. Just don’t make it too personal or private. Boundaries are important too, people.
5. The “What Do You Like About Your Life” Topic
When it comes to dating, it’s really easy to get caught with talks of the past, like sharing childhood memories, as well as what the future might hold. But it’s actually the present moment that not only matters, but divulges, the most. Which is why asking your date what they like most about their life is super intriguing. Inquire about their passions, pets, and/or what they love to do on a Sunday morning. Who knows? You might discover you have similar passions, which is almost as attractive as watching your date light up when they talk about their dog.
The first date might be crucial, but it’s the second date that serves as the best way to really get a sense of the love potential between you and your new match. By furthering your conversations while also keeping things fun with your date, you’ll find that date number two is both meaningful and insightful, which will help you answer the ultimate question: should you go out on a third date?
