Being in a relationship is hard work—and if you’re in it for the long run, it’s important to do a little scheduled maintenance every once in awhile. Even couples who seem like they have it all together on the outside are constantly making sure that things don’t get stale. If you’ve been dating for awhile, and things have been good, it still makes sense to look for brand new ways to turn on the guy in your life.
Turn-ons don’t always have to be sexual. In fact, just a simple, everyday action may make him glad he’s dating you. On the other hand, if you’re in a brand new relationship, learning new tips to find out how to turn him on will make things easier—especially if your relationship is just getting physical.
Here are a few of the biggest turn ons for guys to get him interested:
If you wear contacts, switch it up with glasses.
No, you’re not going to look dorky. Glasses are in, and plenty of guys love the look. Not only will switching up to glasses every once in awhile be a turn-on, especially since guys dig it when you’re confident enough to get really comfortable, but it’ll be a nice break for your eyes as well. Whether or not your spectacles remind him of a sexy librarian or just the first time you spent the night at his place, they’re sure to get a reaction.
Tell him about a sexy dream you had about him.
Guys, in general, aren’t about dreams that go nowhere. (And, be honest. Many of them do. That doesn’t mean they’re not fun to talk about.) Sex dreams and overall romantic dreams are common, and if you have one that features your guy, you should let him know. Who knows, it might inspire a sexual desire you never even knew you had.
Give him a spontaneous neck rub.
If your guy likes to be touched, he’ll probably appreciate an impromptu neck rub. If you look up a few good techniques prior to diving in, he’ll dig it even more. Not only can massages put people in the mood, but he’ll love the fact that you’re being attentive. If he’s been stressed out or has a job that’s very labor-intensive, the rub will be a surefire success.
Have him get in the car, but don’t tell him where you’re driving to.
Guys like to be surprised. If you’re dating a thrill-seeker, they’ll be majorly turned on if you have an adventure in mind that he’s unaware of. Just make sure that wherever you go, it’s somewhere he’ll have a lot of fun. Not say, the mall since you need to buy yourself a new pair of ballet flats.
If you’re feeling super risky, you might even want to consider blindfolding him during the journey. Just keep in mind that blindfolds aren’t for everyone—if he gets a little paranoid by it, make sure he knows it’s an optional part of the experience.
Let your hair down—literally.
Know how good it feels when you shake your hair out after it’s been in a tight bun all day? Try doing that in front of your boyfriend and see what happens. This small, easy act is kind of the physical version of yelling out, “I’m ready to relax.” It’s alluring (especially if you run your fingers through your hair a little bit) and guaranteed to make him smile and think about how lucky he is to have you in his life.
Ask him questions about his day.
Even if you still don’t understand a lot of it—as many jobs these days are kind of hard to sum up in a few brief sentences—the fact that you’re trying to connect on this level will impress him. It shows you value his career, and are all-in as a true partner. It’s a turn-on that’ll last for quite some time—especially if you’re with a guy who doesn’t have an outlet for work chatter.
Let your hug linger.
Hugs come in all sizes—there’s the brief “nice to see you again” hug, where you’re going through the actions yet barely making contact, and there’s the hug in which you try to get as close as possible. The hug that’ll turn him on is in the latter category. Go in for a hug, press yourself close, and wrap your arms around him. If you find a place to nuzzle into his neck, it’ll make the gesture even more romantic.
Be open about your fantasies.
It’s hard to talk about sex sometimes. Even though it’s a natural process (we all wouldn’t be here without it) there’s still a bit of a stigma around sex that’s not solely for the purpose of baby-making. If you feel comfortable with your guy, try opening up and communicating about what you wouldn’t mind exploring. Your fantasies might not be a total match—which is okay—but it’s a good way to learn something new about your partner. Plus, even talking about the physical things you’d like to do with him will be a massive turn-on for him.
Give a sly smile.
Smiles are wonderful, but sly smiles make it seem like you’ve got something on your mind that you can’t openly say out loud. That’ll leave him wondering about what you’re thinking—and if it’s something that involves him. His own mind might wander a bit. A sly smile can also serve as somewhat of an inside joke—if you’re watching something on television that references something he might have said earlier, and make eye contact with that sly smile, it shows that the two of you share something special.
Turn-ons are different for every guy, and sometimes, you’ll end up figuring out his individual turn-ons by accident. While the tips above might be a good place to start, don’t get discouraged if they don’t immediately lead to the exact response you’re looking for. As your relationship progresses, you’ll learn a lot more about what turns him on, and what he can’t resist.