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What Is A Love-Hate Relationship And Is It Good For You?

Happy young couple smiling at each while washing dishes and navigating a love-hate relationship.

Are you in a love-hate relationship? When you’re feeling lovestruck, it can be hard to remember what you dislike about your partner. However, when love switches to hate, all you can think of are the intense emotions that are making you angry. 

This dynamic can be disorienting, as well as making it difficult to know whether you should stay with your partner or not. But, what is a love-hate relationship and how do you know if you’re in one? We’ve tackled all of this below!

Love-Hate Relationship Meaning: What Is It?

A love-hate relationship usually involves a lot of mixed emotions. In most cases, you’ll know that you’re in one if your feelings towards your partner are constantly changing. At times you might adore them and at other moments you might find it difficult to even be around them. 

While the specifics of a love-hate relationship can vary from couple to couple, there are a few common signs that you can look out for. Not sure if you’re in a love-hate relationship? Here’re a few common signs to watch out for.

4 Signs That You Could Be In a Love-Hate Relationship

1. You’re constantly breaking up and making up

Every couple goes through ups and downs in their relationship. But if you’re in a relationship that’s on-again-off-again, you may need to take time out to decide what you really want. Huge arguments that cause you to break up frequently are a sign that your relationship is on rocky ground. Try learning to communicate properly and to navigate conflict more effectively.

2. Your stress levels are skyrocketing

In good relationships, couples work as a team and support each other during the rough patches. But love-hate relationships cause you stress and make it harder to deal with the everyday challenges of life. The more run down you feel, the more difficult it is to fix the issues that you and your partner are facing.

3. You complain about your partner all the time

If you’re always complaining about your significant other, it’s a sign that you’re in an unhealthy relationship. We all vent to our bestie from time to time, but if you’re constantly badmouthing your partner, you may have bigger problems. Over time, you might start to hate the qualities of your partner that you loved when you first met.

4. You feel confused

Love-hate relationships leave you feeling insecure and unsure about what’s going on. You might find yourself torn between whether you want to spend the rest of your life with this person or break up with them. These mixed emotions could be because you love some of your partner’s behaviors but are beginning to hate other parts of them.

Is a Love-Hate Relationship Good for You?

The truth about love-hate relationships is that they aren’t good for you. They can leave you on an emotional rollercoaster and stop you from enjoying life. Consistency builds trust in a relationship. If your emotions are constantly shifting it can be difficult for you and your partner to rely on each other. 

When your relationship is in a stable place, it’s easier to make plans and look forward to the future. Below, we’ve put together some advice on how to cope with a love-hate relationship.

1. Name your emotions

Rather than switching from love to hate, try to find out what’s upsetting you. Are there certain aspects of your partner’s behavior that are making you feel angry or sad? If you can identify what the problem is, you can have a constructive conversation with them and try to resolve the issue. Hating your partner may help you vent your frustrations but it damages your relationship in the long run.

2. Spend time apart

Take time out to enjoy your passions and hobbies. When you spend time doing what you love, it can help you to relax and unwind. It’s easier not to take the minor annoyances in your relationship too seriously when you’re feeling happy. 

If you’re expecting your partner to meet all your needs, it can put a strain on your relationship. Instead, spend time with friends regularly and connect to a wider support system.

3. Remember the good times

Why did you fall in love with your partner in the first place? Focus on the positives in your relationship and make a list of everything that you love about your partner. 

This doesn’t mean that you forget about the problems in your relationship that need to be resolved. Rather, find solutions to these issues and then focus on building on the positive aspects of your relationship.

4. Consider ending the relationship

If there are serious issues in your relationship, you may want to consider breaking up. Constant fighting and complaining can leave both of you feeling miserable. Take some time out to reflect on your relationship and decide if it’s the best fit for you. If you or your partner are constantly unhappy, it may be best for both of you to move on. 

Find the Way That Works Best for You

So, you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them? Then you’re in a love-hate relationship. Make the effort to resolve your problems together with your partner and find a way to deal with the issue that works best for you. 

If things don’t improve then it might be a sign that it’s time to take the bold step of moving on with your life. This doesn’t have to be a negative step though and there are plenty of great ways to really enjoy single life before you jump back into the dating scene!

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