The 100 Cheesiest Pick Up Lines to Make You Laugh and Cringe

A woman listening to her boyfriend telling her one of the cheesiest pick up lines ever and laughing with him.

First impressions don’t have to be hard. And though the majority of pickup lines are horrible, there are a few out there that are so ridiculous and over the top, that they make us laugh despite ourselves. They may not be the best lines to use when chatting up a stranger in a bar or on a dating app, but if you’re trying to make you significant other laugh. Or be a little flirty or silly,  these weirdly hilarious pickup lines may just give you and odd kind of charm.

Besides, there’s nothing like a little awkwardness to set the mood. Here are the cheesiest pick up lines you’ve ever heard!

  1. I’ll give up my morning cereal to spoon you instead.
  2. Do you like this shirt? Thanks, it’s made out of boyfriend/girlfriend material. 
  3. Even if you had 0 followers, I’d follow you anywhere.
  4. Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
  5. If Princess Toad looked liked you, I would have killed Bowser years ago.
  6. Can I have your Instagram? My parents said I should follow my dreams.
  7. Nice hair, wanna mess it up?
  8. Hey, do you happen to have a Bandaid? I scraped my knee up pretty bad when I fell for you.
  9. Are you a time traveler? Cause I see you in my future!
  10. If you were steak, you’d be well done.
  11. You don’t know how many times I’ve had to swipe left to find you.
  12. I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness. 
  13. Do you live in a museum? Because you truly are a work of art.
  14. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?
  15. If you and I were socks we’d sure make a great pair. 
  16. I wish I were cross-eyed so I could see you twice.
  17. If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together.
  18. Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
  19. I’ll nickname you bannana because I find you a-peeling.
  20. Are you a magician??? Because Abraca-DAYUM!
  21. Have you been to the doctor’s lately? Because I think you’re lacking some vitamin me.
  22. My doctor says I’m lacking vitamin U.
  23. If you were a triangle, you’d be a acute one. 
  24. Are you a keyboard? Because you sure are my type. 
  25. I’ve lost my number, can I have yours? 
  26. You breathe oxygen, too? We have so much in common.
  27. You raise my dopamine levels.
  28. You make me wanna clean up my room.
  29. You must be a magician because every time I look at you everyone else disappears. 
  30. Your daddy must be a drug dealer because you’re dope. 
  31. Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?
  32. Let’s flip a coin. Head’s your mine, tail’s I’m yours.
  33. Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world? 
  34. You must have the power to change gravity because you knocked me off my feet.
  35. I think there’s something wrong with my eyes, I can’t take them off of you.
  36. Let’s make like fabric softener and Snuggle. 
  37. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m feeling a connection.
  38. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
  39. Can you be the Harley Quinn to my Joker, cause I like em’ crazy!
  40. Do you use Waze? I need to find the fastest route to your heart.
  41. If you were a chicken you’d be impeccable. 
  42. Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you. 
  43. Are you an omelette? Because you’re making me egg-cited.
  44. Are you a hurricane? Because you’re blowing me away. 
  45. Can I tie your shoes? Cause I don’t want you to fall for someone else.
  46. You look a lot like my next soul mate.
  47. Are you an alien? Because you’re out of this world!
  48. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again? 
  49. If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
  50. Let’s plant a garden to put our tulips together!
  51. Aside from taking my breath away, what do you do for a living?
  52. Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? 
  53. Can I be your next mistake?
  54. Are you a bank loan? Because you’ve got my interest.
  55. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
  56. If you were word on a page you’d be fine print. 
  57. It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m totally checking you out. 
  58. Life without you is like a broken pencil… pointless. 
  59. Are you a beaver? Because dam!
  60. You put the cheese in my macaroni.
  61. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll return it.
  62. Is it hard being that cute?
  63. If you were a soccer play, you’d be a keeper.
  64. I’m no electrician, but I can light up your day.
  65. You dropped something. My jaw!
  66. Are you tired? Cause you’ve been running through my mind all day.
  67. May I end this sentence with a proposition?
  68. I know you’re busy today but can you add me to your to-do list?
  69. Hey, I think you have something in your eye. Never mind, that’s just your sparkle.
  70. Wouldn’t we look good on a wedding cake together?
  71. If you were a pill, I’d overdose!
  72. Your mom will love me.
  73. I may not be DQ, but I could treat you right.
  74. There’s only one thing I would change about you. Your last name. 
  75. If I were a transplant surgeon, I’d give you my heart.
  76. Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.
  77. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.
  78. Is your name Campbell? Because you’re mmm mmm good.
  79. You see my friend over there? They want to know if you think I’m cute.
  80. You’re so cute you make me stutter. Wha-wha-what’s your name?
  81. Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, a sentencewithoutspaces.
  82. Do you work at Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.
  83. If I were a cat I’d spend all nine lives with you.
  84. Are you my Appendix? Because there’s a funny feeling in my stomach telling me I should take you out.
  85. Did you invent the airplane? Because you sure seem Wright for me.
  86. Is your nickname Chapstick? Because you’re da balm!
  87. If you were a flower you’d be a daaaaaamnnn-delion.
  88. If you were a tropical fruit, you’d be a fine-apple!
  89. Is your name Ariel? Cause we mermaid for each other!
  90. Do you work at Dick’s? Cause you’re sporting the goods.
  91. You must be a very important passage in a textbook, because seeing you is the highlight of my day.
  92. Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!
  93. Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!
  94. Call me Shrek because I’m head ogre heels for you.
  95. Wanna go bowling? I thought it might be right up your alley.
  96. Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
  97. If your heart was a prison, I would like to be sentenced for life.
  98. I love you like a pig loves not being bacon.
  99. Are you parents bakers? Because you are a cutie pie.
  100. Are you a cat? Cause you are purrrfect

 

Be that wacky person who flirts badly with these ridiculous one-liners. Whether your pick up style is cute or silly, there’s a silly line for everyone. Embrace the cheesiest opener you can find and make someone laugh… or roll their eyes. Don’t take it too seriously and have some fun. 

Rachel Esco

Freelance Writer

Rachel is a lifestyle blogger, based in Toronto, who specializes in dating and relationships. Her articles have been featured in publications, including “Huffington Post”, “Life Hacker” and “Women’s Post”.

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