It’s 2020 and the world is a little less binary and a little less heteronormative. The LGBTQA+ community, while not accepted everywhere, has a bit of an easier time than it did years ago and a good example of that is the number of dating apps that work hard to cater to all communities, theirs included.
But that doesn’t mean that adding a few additional sexuality options for people to put on their profile makes the app a safe haven for the LGBTQA+ community. One subsect that’s had it pretty rough are bisexuals, and it can be tricky to find the best bisexual dating apps for you.
Bisexual people have faced a number of stigmas over the years and dating apps can really show off the worst in people. Many bisexuals are stereotyped as being confused about their sexual orientation. The “it’s just a phase” phrase comes to mind. Some believe that bisexuality is simply not a thing at all and that those who say they are bisexual are really on their way to being something else.
Typically, this can be divided along gender lines. Many men who come out as bisexual are told that they really mean that they’re gay, whereas women who come out are often told that they are really straight.
These concepts come down to further stereotypes. Women who are bisexual are often sexualized because some people enjoy watching women together. So many bisexuals are labeled as being bisexual just for attention.
On the other side of the coin, when people who are bisexual choose to have a partner of the opposite sex, they are told that they’re pretending to be bisexual to seem “cool” when they are actually heterosexual.
Bisexuals can face stigma in the LGBTQA+ community and outside of it, putting them in a strangely uncomfortable position of not quite knowing where their community is and how to date in a way that those stigmas don’t affect them.
Finding the best bisexual dating apps can be hard and any bisexual person will tell you that they’ve had at least one negative experience on a mainstream dating app. Thankfully, some apps are making move to make dating easier for the bisexual community.
The Best Bisexual Dating Apps for Your Personal Dating Journey
Best mainstream bisexual dating app that has a large pool: Tinder
Before you immediately click out because Tinder is notoriously not great for bisexual people, hear us out. Tinder has been around since 2012 and it’s come a long way. In fact, Tinder worked with GLAAD to discuss what the LGBTQA+ community wants in the app. They expanded their sexual orientation options significantly and let people search more specifically for the people they’re looking to date.
Tinder remains the largest dating app, meaning that their pool for finding dates is pretty big. That can be both a positive and a negative. The positive is that, with all those options, you’re pretty likely to find at least one person that you mesh with. The negative is that you’re going to have to wade through quite a few not great options.
One of the biggest issues with Tinder is that a lot of couples have started turning to it to try to find a threesome. They create an account as a woman, because there are no joint couples accounts on Tinder, and they specifically look for a bisexual woman.
This is another unfortunate stereotype that, because bisexuals are capable of being into multiple genders, they want to be sexual with all genders all the time. There’s a reason why a unicorn, or a person that couples look for to sleep with for threesomes, are also known as an “HBB” or a “hot bi babe”.
Best app for bisexual women looking for other women: Her
Her boasts the largest population of LGBTQ women in a dating app. Which is pretty helpful if you know what you’re looking for. Men cannot make accounts on the app and women must make accounts linked to their Facebook and Instagram.
It’s not the most thorough verification process, but it does limit catfishing better than some apps do. If you’re looking to date someone who identifies as a woman, this app may be your best bet. Particularly if you’re pretty tired of guys sliding into your messages on other apps who simply tell you that you being bi is “hot.”
On the other side of the coin, you may come across women who are not interested because you may also be interested in or have been in a relationship with men. But, in general, those people are few and far between and this is a fairly welcoming app for all women in the LGBTQ community.
Best app for bisexual men looking for other men: Scruff
While Grindr often is treated like the dating app for gay, bi, trans and queer men, it’s also long been acknowledged that the app isn’t the best for anything other than hookups and a lot of unsolicited genitalia pictures. Because so many people are mostly aware of Grindr, they might not even know that Scruff exists but it does and it actually has over 15 million gay, bi, trans, and queer male users.
The name may imply that the app is just for more burly men, but all kinds of men are represented on this app. Perhaps even cooler, this app boasts a big international community and it encourages you to get to know people on Scruff who are located in places you’re planning to visit.
You may meet a hot date, as well as a travel buddy. Scruff also hosts a lot of events, which helps you connect more within the gay, bi, trans, and queer community. There’s a sense of camaraderie that goes beyond the bounds of simply finding a date.
The best bisexual dating app altogether: OkCupid
OkCupid has come a long way over the years. Once upon a time, anyone could message you and it often left women opening their inbox to find many of unsolicited messages from men asking for a hookup, often not in half as polite terms. But the app had one heck of an overhaul.
Nowadays, no one can message you unless you match, but you’re not just matching on appearance alone. It may take a while to fill out OkCupid’s extensive profiles, but it’s so worth it. Not only can you really specify your sexual and gender orientations, but you can even say exactly what you’re looking for in your relationship.
Looking for a hookup? You can say it. Looking to date long term? You can say it. Looking to date non monogamously? You can even say that. It helps you to weed out the people that you’re not looking for.
Whereas on Tinder, you may accidentally match with a couple trying to make you their unicorn, it’s pretty difficult to do the same on OkCupid. The site has worked hard to become a safe place for all in the LGBTQA+ community and is our top choice for the best of the bisexual dating apps out there.