Dating Data & Stats

Looking for dating data for an article or project? You’ve come to the right spot!

Here you’ll find interesting data about dating and relationships from Zoosk, the online dating site and app with over 40 million members worldwide. Data on this page was either pulled by looking into the behavior of daters using Zoosk or through surveys. When you use a piece of data, we just ask that you link back to the article that it came from or to this page.

If you’re looking for something specific for a story, study, or article and don’t see it here email our data team. We’ll be happy to look up additional stats and are happy to share what we know.

This page was last updated 5/15/17.

 

Online Dating Data & Insights

Dating Profile Advice – Photos

General Photo Dos:
(Data from How to Choose the Best Online Dating Photo.)

  • People who have a full-body photos get 203% more incoming messages than the average, and 33% more responses to their outgoing messages.
  • People who wear a sports outfit (like a jersey) get 32% more messages, and 17% more responses to their outgoing messages.
  • Women who have a selfie photo get 4% more messages.
  • Men who have a photo of themselves outdoors get 19% more messages.
  • People who have a vacation/travel photo in their profile get 6% more messages.
  • People who have verified photos (a Zoosk feature) get 100% more incoming messages than the average.

General Photo Don’ts:
(Data from How to Choose the Best Online Dating Photo.)

  • People who wear sunglasses get 63% fewer messages than the average.
  • People who pose with an animal in their photo get 53% fewer messages than the average.
  • People who have more than one person in their photo get 42% fewer messages than the average.
  • Women who have an outdoor photo get 40% fewer messages than the average.
  • Men who have a selfie photo get 8% fewer messages than the average.

Men’s Take On Women’s Photos:
(Data from How to Choose the Best Online Dating Photo.)

  • 55% of men say a woman’s profile photos are more important than what she says in her profile description
  • When asked what they notice in a woman’s profile photo first:
    • 53% of men say eyes
    • 32% of men say body
    • 12% of men say hair
    • 3% of men say lips
  • 86% of men said a woman with light and natural makeup would make them click on her profile.

Dating Profile Advice – Descriptions

Dating Profile Tips for Men & Women:

  • Fill out everything. (Data from Why Your Online Dating Profile Description Matters.)
    • People who fill out a display name when asked get 20% more messages than those who don’t.
    • People who fill out their description get 28% more messages than those who don’t.
  • Highlight your positive traits (Data from 25 Quick Online Dating Tips Based on Data)
    • People with the word laugh in their profile get more messages.
    • People who use the word honest in their profile get more messages.
    • People with the word healthy in their profile get 17% more messages.
  • Be careful about your word choice.
    (Data from The Secret Word the Best Dating Profiles Have in Common)

    • Profiles with the word healthy get 17% more messages.
    • Profiles with the word laid back get 50% fewer messages.
    • Profiles with the word ambitious get 38% fewer messages.
    • Profiles with the word job get 10% fewer messages.
    • Profiles with the word serious get 10% fewer messages.
    • Profiles with the word casual get 2% fewer messages.

Dating Profile Tips for Men:

  • Don’t be unsure or aloof. (Data from 5 Online Dating Profile No-Nos Men Should Stay Away From)
    • Men with the word maybe in their profile get 2% fewer messages.
    • Men with the word dunno in their profile get 8% fewer messages.
    • Men with the phrase sort of in their profile get 9% fewer messages.
    • Men with the phrase kind of in their profile get 3% fewer messages.
    • Men with the phrase not sure in their profile get 16% fewer messages.
  • Don’t call yourself an entrepreneur (Data from 5 Online Dating Profile No-Nos Men Should Stay Away From)
    • Men with the word entrepreneur in their profile get 16% fewer messages.
    • Men with the word CEO in their profile get 31% more messages.
    • Men with the word founder in their profile get 27% more messages.

Dating Messaging Advice

Dating Messaging Advice for Men & Women:

  • The ideal first message is 61–69 characters long (Data from Are Your Online Dating Messages Too Long?)
    • The reply rate for messages 61–69 characters is 15% higher than the average.
    • Also, messages that are more than 17 characters get 17% more responses than those that are less than 17 characters.
  • Focus on unique, specific compliments (Data from Data-backed Tips for Writing Better Online Dating Messages)
    • Messages that compliment someone’s hair get 6% more responses.
    • Messages that compliment someone’s eyes get 11% more responses.
    • Messages that compliment someone’s glasses get 39% more responses.
    • Messages that compliment someone’s tattoo get 13% more responses.
  • Don’t be afraid to be flirty (Data from Data-backed Tips for Writing Better Online Dating Messages)
    • Messages that use the word crush get 26% more responses.
    • Messages that use the word adorable get 64% more responses.
    • Messages that use the word trouble get 42% more responses.
  • Talk about the bad weather (Data from 4 Online Dating First Message Tips You Probably Haven’t Tried Yet)
    • Messages that use the word weather get 39% more responses.
    • Messages that use the word rain get 20% more responses.
    • Messages that use the word sun get 6% fewer responses.
  • Give compliments (Data from 25 Quick Online Dating Tips Based on Data)
    • Messages with the word cool get 62% more responses.
    • Messages with the word interesting get 92% more responses
  • Be fun, funny, and even a little flirty (Data from 25 Quick Online Dating Tips Based on Data)
    • Messages with the word fun get 28% more responses.
    • Messages that use the word crush get 26% more responses. (same as men)
    • Messages with the word cute get 54% more responses.
    • Messages with the word funny get 108% more responses.
  • When you laugh, let the other person know (Data from The 5 Minute Guide to Building the Perfect Online Dating Profile)
    • Messages with lmfao get 193% more responses
    • Messages with lmao get 76% more responses
    • Messages with haha get 55% more responses
    • Messages with lol get 46% more responses
    • Messages with rofl get 13% fewer responses

Dating Messaging Advice for Women:

  • Don’t be afraid to come on too strong (Data from The 5 Minute Guide to Building the Perfect Online Dating Profile)
    • First messages to men that mention dinner, drinks, or lunch get 73% more responses.
    • Messages to men with the word baby get 118% more responses.
    • Messages to men with the word beautiful get 50% more responses.
  • The best time of day to message a man is between 8:45 and 10:00 a.m. (Data from Data-backed Tips for Writing Better Online Dating Messages)
    • Most men use online dating sites between 9:00 and 10:00 a.m.
    • Most women use dating sites in the morning between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m. so the majority of them aren’t taking part in this prime time.
    • The worst time to message men is between 2:00 and 3:00 p.m. since they’re least likely to be online at that time.

Dating Messaging Advice for Men:

  • The best time of day to message a woman is between 9:45 and 11:00 p.m. (Data from The Best Time to Message a Woman Online)
    • Most women use online dating sites between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m.
    • Most men use dating sites in the morning between 9:00 and 10:00 so the majority of them aren’t taking part in this prime time.
  • Don’t copy & paste the same message to multiple women (Data from Data Reveals the Biggest Online Dating First Message Mistakes)
    • 87% of good-looking guys who weren’t getting replies to their messages, were sending the same exact message to multiple women.
    • On average, it was about 15 women getting each message.
  • Don’t use these online dating first message clichés. (Data from Data Reveals the Biggest Online Dating First Message Mistakes.) Good-looking guys who weren’t getting a lot of replies to their messages were sending messages with similar phrases and striking out with multiple women:
    • getting to know you…
    • love/hope to hear from you…
    • hi/how’s your day/how are you doing…
    • I’m looking for…
    • saying you’re a nice guy…
  • Don’t just say hi or hello. (Data from 4 Online Dating First Message Tips You Probably Haven’t Tried Yet)
    • Messages to women that use the word hi get 22% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the word hello get 21% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the word howdy get 19% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the word hey get 35% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the phrase what’s up get 10% fewer responses.
  • Don’t ask her out in the first message. Find out if she’s free first. (Data from 4 Online Dating First Message Tips You Probably Haven’t Tried Yet)
    • Messages to women that use the word date get 14% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the phrase go out get 56% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women that use the phrase tomorrow night get 26% more response.
  • Mention her profile, not her photos. (Data from 4 Online Dating First Message Tips You Probably Haven’t Tried Yet)
    • Messages to women with the word profile get 12% more messages.
    • Messages to women with the word photo or photos get 25% fewer messages.
  • Don’t just ask a question. That leaves the ball in her court.
    • Messages with a ? get 5% fewer messages.
  • Don’t come on too strong (Data from The 5 Minute Guide to Building the Perfect Online Dating Profile)
    • Messages to women with the word baby get 10% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women with the word beautiful get 13% fewer responses.
  • When asking a woman you might want to be more creative than drinks. (Data from  Is the Lunch Date the New Go-to First Date?)
    • Messages to women with the word lunch get 25% more responses than the average.
    • Coffee dates are the least popular date idea  for women with 32% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women with the word restaurant get 8% more responses.
    • Messages to women with bar get 9% more responses.
    • Messages to women with dinner get 13% fewer responses.
    • Messages to women with drink get 3% fewer responses.

 

General Dating Data & Insights

Date Ideas
(Data from The Best Date Ideas According to Online Dating Data. Included full data set with information not pulled out below.)

  • Coffee or dinner dates are preferred by women of all ages. 
    • Women in their 20s and 30s list dinner most often when describing their ideal date.
    • Women in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and 60s list coffee most often when describing their ideal date.
  • Going for a walk is a great idea.
    • For women in their 20s walk is the 4th most mentioned word/phrase while describing their ideal date.
    • For women in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and 60s walk is the 3rd most mentioned word/phrase while describing their ideal date.
  • Quiet and conversation were also popular descriptors while explaining what makes a great day.
    • Conversation was the 3rd most mentioned word/phrase for women in their 40s, 4th most mentioned for women in their 60s, and 6th most mentioned for women in their 30s.
    • Quiet was the 7th most mentioned word/phrase for women in their 60s, 8th for women in their 40s and 50s, and 15th for women in their 30s.
  • All women like wine.
    • Women of every age group mentioned wine before beer or pub while describing their perfect date.
    • Women in their 50s and 60s mentioned wine more often than those in their 20s, 30s. and 40s.
  • Women in their 20s and 30s like to be surprised.
    • For women in their 20s  surprise was the 14th most mentioned.
    • For women in their 30s surprise was the 13th most mentioned.
  • Women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s like to go dancing.
    • For women in their 40s dancing was the 15th most mentioned.
    • For women in their 60s dancing was the 16th most mentioned.
    • For women in their 50s dancing was the 18th most mentioned.
    • Music was also mentioned by all age groups and was most popular with women in their 40s.

Dating and Our Mother’s Influence
(Data from Daters Reveal That They Want Mom’s Approval on Who They Date)

  • 67% of women say it’s important to have their mom’s approval on who they’re dating.
  • 63% of men say it’s important to have their mom’s approval on who they’re dating.
  • 16% of people said they would break up with someone their mom didn’t like.
  • 50% of daters want specific feedback from their moms on who they’re dating.
  • 73% of people think their mom can sense when someone they’re dating makes them happy.
  • 48% of men and 46% of women said their moms think shared values are the most important think to look for in a partner.
  • Moms value someone with a good/stable job for their daughters more than their sons.

Dating/Relationship Timelines
(Data from Study Reveals the Best Time to Bring Up Personal Details)

  • 70% of men would disclose if they were seeing other people on the first date.
  • 62% of woman would disclose if they were seeing other people on the first date.
  • 50% of men want to define the relationship as exclusive after the first few dates.
  • 33% of women want to define the relationship as exclusive after the first few dates.
  • 50% of both men and women want to discuss past relationships after dating after a few weeks.
  • 56% of men want to discuss marriage after at least 6 months of dating.
  • 54% of women want to discuss marriage after at least 6 months of dating.
  • 52% of men never want to know their date’s number of past sexual partners.
  • 41% of women never want to know their date’s number of past sexual partners.
  • 32% of men would disclose if they had an unusual sexual fetish or situation the first time they talked to someone.
  • 28% of women would disclose if they had an unusual sexual fetish or situation the first time they talked to someone.

Dating and Our Sibling’s Influence
(Data from How Our Siblings Influence Who We Date)

  • 54% of daters reported that when they’re seriously interested in someone, their brothers and sisters are the first people in their family who know about it.
  • 52% of daters said their siblings are the first people to meet the person they’re dating.
  • 41% of daters said they’d date someone who didn’t get along well with their siblings, 34% said maybe but not likely, and 24% said they wouldn’t at all.
  • 30% of daters said they value both their parents and their sibling’s opinion about who they date. 15% said they valued their sibling’s opinion more. 16% said that their parents opinion mattered the most. And 39% said they didn’t care about their family’s opinions at all.

Dating Data for Specific Demographics

Armed Forces/Military Data
(Data from Online Daters Show the Love for Our Armed Forces)

  • People in the armed forces get a lot more attention (especially those who have done active duty) than your average online dater
  • People who mention active duty in their profile receive 134% more messages than the average online dater.
  • People who mention military get 65% more messages.
  • People who mention armed forces get 22% more messages.
  • People who talk about active duty in a message get 54% more responses than the average.
  • People who talk about armed forces in a message get 29% more responses.
  • People who mention veteran get 65% more messages.
  • The different branches of the military get their fair share of attention as well
    • People who mention army get 24% more messages.
    • People who mention marines get 18% more messages.
    • People who mention navy get 38% more messages.
    • People who mention air force get 42% more messages.
    • People who mention coast guard get 53% more messages.
    • People who mention natural guard get 69% more messages.

Single Dads
(Data from Survey Finds that Women Find Single Dads Irresistible)

  • 83% of women said they would date a single dad.
  • 44% of single dads say they start evaluating someone’s parenting skills before the first date.
  • 43% of single dads said they only introduce their kid to someone when they know it’s serious.
  • 44% of single dads admit that they let their kids dictate their relationship.

Single Moms
(Data from Single Mom Dating Tips: How to Online Date with Kids)

  • Women with kids get 13% more messages than those without children.
  • Women with kids engage in 55% more deep conversations than those without children.
  • Women who mention kids, son, or daughter in a message have a response rate 6% higher than the average.
  • Women who mention son, daughter, teenager, children, or single mom in their dating profile get 4% fewer messages.

Black Men 
(Data from Black Men’s Dating Profiles Reveal What They’re Looking For In a Woman. Article has full data set with additional information not mentioned below.)

  • Black men are looking for a woman who’s ambitious.
    • For men in their 20s ambitious was the 5th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 30s ambitious was the 3rd most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 40s ambitious was the 10th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
  • Black men value someone with a relationship with God.
    • For men in their 30s God was the 5th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 40s God was the 5th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men 50+ God was the 5th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
  • Black men put more emphasis on a woman who’s open.
    • For men in their 40s open was the 4th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 30s and 50+ open was the 6th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 20s open was the 9th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
  • Black men like beautiful women.
    • For men in their 20s beautiful was the 7th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For men in their 30s and 40s beautiful was the 7th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For who are 50+ beautiful was the 15th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.

Black Women 
(Data from Dating Data Reveals What Black Women Want In a Man. Article has full data set with additional information not mentioned below.)

  • Black women are looking for a man who’s ambitious.
    • For women in their 20s ambitious was the 4th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women in their 30s ambitious was the 7th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women in their 40s ambitious was the 14th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
  • Black women value someone with a relationship with God.
    • For women in their 20s God was the 12th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women in their 30s God was the 6th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women in their 40s God was the 5th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women 50+ God was the 4th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
  • Black women want a man who’s respectful.
    • For women in their 20s respectful was the 14th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.
    • For women in their 30s and 40s respectful was the 16th most mentioned trait when describing their perfect match.

Seasonal Dating Data

Spring
(Data from Spring Dating Fever is On!)

  • Online daters start 34% more conversations a day in the spring.
  • Online daters have 28% more deep conversations in the spring.
  • People sign up for online dating sites 11% more in the spring.
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