Why Being Single and 30 Is Kind of the Best

A woman who's single and 30 having a drink.

Now that more people are getting married later in life, there are more people who are 30 and single than ever. But with Facebook constantly shoving happy families in our faces and society doing the whole There’s something wrong with you; you’re going to die alone… thing, this can cause some thirty-somethings to panic, but if you think about it, you’re actually ahead of the game in a lot of ways.

Being 30 and single is totally awesome, and not just because there’s no one to judge you when you eat cheese for dinner. Here are some really solid reasons:

1. You know who you are.
Your teen years are spent trying to be like everyone else, your twenties are for trying to figure out what makes you stand apart, and in your thirties, you’ve finally settled into your own skin, and this makes finding someone else to spend your life with way easier. Your past relationships have helped you figure out exactly what you value and exactly what you want in another person. Add that to the fact that you’ve also figured out all the things you have to offer to someone else, and it makes for a pretty solid package. Many in their thirties ditch that fiendish need to impress everyone and adopt a Take-It-Or-Leave-It mentality. (If you haven’t done this yet, give it a whirl. It’s great.)

2. You ain’t broke.
In college, the social scene was a lot of dollar pizza slices, Tuesday afternoon matinees, and the perpetual anxiety that you’re going to overdraw you account while you’re out at a bar with someone you’re trying to impress. Then you moved to your mid-twenties, which were a lot of ill-advised trips to Vegas that required a constant upping of your blood alcohol level to battle the perpetual anxiety that you’re going to, once again, overdraw your account while you’re out at a bar with someone you’re trying to impress. At some point in your thirties, you figured out how to save a little money, AND pay your bills on time, AND manage a credit line so you can worry about other things when you’re out at a bar with someone you’re trying to impress.

3. There are more divorcees to choose from.
Okay, yes, that may sound weird, but stick with me. People who have been through a divorce are some of the most emotionally evolved people on the dating scene. They know what works in a relationship and what doesn’t, and not only that, they’ve faced some consequences that reinforce those learnings. You can’t go through something like a divorce, no matter how smooth and amicable, without gaining some emotional maturity. Divorced people tend to know exactly what does and doesn’t work for them and their lifestyle, and more often than not, they aren’t going to waste their time messing around if they’re interested. Less game playing, more keeping it real. It’s dating pool gold.

4. Your parents are panicking.
Again, this one may sound strange and not much like a benefit, but it is. Your parents want the best for you, and just like your own ideas of what’s best for you have probably changed since you were in your twenties, likely theirs have too. For example, if your idea of “The One” was ever unaligned with your parents’, bringing someone home could be a major stressor at best, and a total disaster at worst. Once you’re in your thirties, they get WAY less picky, and their “Find someone, settle down, give me grandkids…” task list starts to morph into “Just make yourself happy.” They start to trust your instincts a little more (and so do you), and when you do bring someone home to meet them, they’re more inclined to be open-minded. Take their panic that you’ll never settle down and live a happy domestic life, and enjoy the elasticity it gives you.

5. The freedom factor.
All those smiling baby photos and testimonies about how your friends’ chubby, snuggly lil’ guys have enriched their lives in ways they couldn’t have imagined come at a price, and that price is Sunday brunch mimosa bars. Southwest weekender deals to L.A. Eighteen hours of uninterrupted Netflix marathons. Never sharing your popcorn. Long showers. Spending all your money on your dog. A clean house. Staying out till 3 AM, and still getting 8 hours of sleep. Never stepping on Legos. Dinner at restaurants that aren’t Applebees sometimes. I could go on, but need I?

Savor your lifestyle. Savor your singlehood. Marriage, kids, and domestic bliss are totally amazing, but so is the opportunity to live the way you want, when you want it. And doing it in your thirties comes with an added bonus of being a little smarter, a little wiser, and a little more financially responsible, and all of these plusses mean a single life that’s more enriching than ever! So turn up Beyonce’s sacred anthem, dance around in your underwear, and eat that cheese for dinner. You’re the king of your world.

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