How to Survive Valentine’s Day When You’re Single in Your 40s

A woman who's single in her 40s sipping from a coffee cup that says love in it.

Many view being single on Valentine’s Day as sad and depressing. You may still be feeling the sting of a relationship that ended, or you are just frustrated that you can’t find the right person. Hearing about all the romantic plans of your friends and family who are married or in relationships can be like salt in the wound. But it doesn’t have to be that way. With a little planning on your part, you can turn Valentine’s Day into a celebration of friends and of yourself.

What women can do to make Valentine’s Day an enjoyable time despite being single.

1) Invite other single friends over for a chocolate martini, some decadent snacks, and a fun, action or comedy movie night. This way you can laugh with friends and not feel alone, and avoid watching romantic movies that make you feel depressed.

2) Set up a pampering spa night for yourself. Create a scented tub with candles and a glass of wine and give yourself a facial. Change your bed sheets and spritz them with your favorite scent so you can climb into bed early and sleep peacefully.

3) Create a healthy low-cal meal for yourself with all fresh ingredients. Feel good about all the calories you saved from a big dinner out and candy, while avoiding seeing all the happy couples out at a restaurant.

4) If you prefer going out, don’t be reluctant. Visit your local bar or club with a friend because this is the one night that men are often out showing off that they’re single and looking for love. Put on your red dress and paint the town!

What men can do to make Valentine’s Day an enjoyable time despite being single.

1) Even though you’d rather be wining and dining that special lady, use this night to get together with the single guys in your man cave for some beer and wings.

2) If you’re into online dating, tonight is the night where all the singles will be trolling the sites. Log on to your favorite dating site and give a woman a compliment. Who knows what could happen?

3) If you prefer going out, there will be plenty of ladies out with friends looking to meet that special someone. Splurge, and order a decadent red drink for the lady who catches your eye.

Valentine’s Day is really just another day created by Hallmark. Don’t let this one day get you down. In fact, get excited for the unknown. Spring is around the corner and love will be in the air. So be optimistic. You never know when you’re going to meet that special someone.

Tonia DeCosimo

Author on Dating and Relationships

Tonia, a successful entrepreneur, received her B.S. degree in Elementary Education and English from Manhattan College. Her career path, however, took her into the fields of marketing, publishing, and sales consulting in which she has worked successfully for the past 25 years. During that time, she has built and managed several companies including her own.

When she’s not busy building her career or dishing out dating advice, Tonia is the proud step-mom of two teenagers, resides on Long Island with her husband.

To read more of Tonia’s work and learn about her book Single and Not Settling, visit or follower her on Twitter at @ToniaDeCosimo.

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