couple standing behind white towel trying out ways how to spice up your sex life

Sex is an important part of any romantic relationship, but it can still be difficult to talk about. Whether you’re newly dating or have been married for years, communicating with your partner about intimacy can be intimidating. We’ve got ten really good ideas on how to spice up your sex life and make it fun to talk about. 

10 Do-Able Ideas: How to Spice Up Your Sex Life

  1. Get Out of Bed

When we think of having sex, the bed is our go-to for adult fun, but it doesn’t have to be. Taking things out of the bedroom has the benefit of changing our environment and giving us a sense of novelty. Try using the kitchen table as a prop, just be sure you’re alone!

  1. Role-Playing

Pretending we’re someone else can be empowering and exciting. Why not take this to the bedroom? You don’t have to go all out with role play to spice up your sex life. Role-playing can be as simple as switching up your usual role in bed. Are you normally more submissive? Try being in control.

  1. Sensual Massage

Nothing feels better after a long day at work than a great massage. If you want to spice up your sex life, make it a sensual massage. Light candles, put on soothing music, and rub away your partner’s tension with soft strokes across their skin. Where your hands go from there is up to you and your partner!

  1. Talk It Up

Anticipation can work in your favor when it comes to your sex life. Sending your partner naughty messages throughout the day builds sexual tension and gives you both something fun to look forward to when you get home. Tell them what you would love to experience with them later in the evening. If you’re both comfortable, you can try a striptease photoshoot with your messages for added spice!

  1. Wake Them Up

Alarm clocks are overrated. Wouldn’t you rather wake up with a smile? Try waking up your partner with sensual touches or even oral sex to spice up your sex life. You’ll want to be sure they’re okay with this first, consent is important, even within a relationship.

  1. Shop Together For a Toy

If you’ve never been shopping together for a sex toy, you’re missing out on a great experience. Sex toys are a great way to spice up your sex life, and shopping for them together is a fun ice breaker. You’ll have a hard time not enjoying yourself during the trip. Sex should be fun and picking out a toy to use together is no different.

  1. Leave Them Love Notes

There’s nothing sweeter than finding a handwritten note from your lover. Tell them how nice they looked when they got ready that morning. Say how touchable their butt is. Tell them you can’t wait to hug and kiss them when they return. Notes found throughout the day start conversations that lead to sensual touches when you’re together.

  1. Tease Them

Teasing our partners can add spice to our sex lives we didn’t know was possible. If lingerie is your thing, try wearing it under your clothing, then telling your partner. Knowing you’re a sex goddess under your regular everyday clothes makes you feel amazing and gives your partner something to look forward to, when you disrobe that night.

Guys can get in on the fun too. Sexy underwear, teasing and tempting photos to your partner, and soft touches when you walk past them are all excellent ways to build up the fun to come.

  1. Take it on the Run

Scheduling sex may sound counter-intuitive to adding spice to your sex life, but it can if you do it right. Think about the last time you planned a vacation. After booking your flights, hotel, and tours, you were excited about the fun to come. Planning a sex vacation works the same way.

Schedule a night away from home in a nice hotel and treat it like a vacation. You don’t have to leave town, unless you want to, but you should find a nice place where you can relax and enjoy yourself. 

  1. Treat Yourself

Sex with your partner is important and integral to your relationship, but sex with yourself is equally important. Why not incorporate the two and masturbate, together? Mutual masturbation can add spice to your sex life with a touch of voyeurism and exhibition rolled into one.

You get the benefit of seeing exactly what your partner desires when they touch themselves and doing something different in the bedroom together.

How To Spice Up Your Sex Life: Why It’s Important

People get into a routine in life, including their sex lives. We become comfortable with what we know and that can lead to sex that feels routine. Spicing up our sex lives adds intimacy to our relationships and gives us the opportunity to talk to our partners about what they desire.

It’s important for partners in a relationship to feel they can express themselves and their desires. When you work together to find new ways to spice up your sex life, you’re igniting a spark that lasts beyond the bedroom.

Demeter DeLune

Demeter is a writer and sex positive blogger who’s been practicing what she preaches for longer than she’d like to admit. She’s the friend you have to warn your other friends about and channels that into her writing. She’s given advice all over the world, but still can’t get her cats to listen.

Discover more about her on her Twitter or website.