9 Flirty Text Mistakes to Avoid at All Costs

A woman who's trying to avoid text flirting mistakes, laughing while outside on her phone typing.

You’d probably assume that flirting through text would be so much easier than in person—but, you’d be wrong. Sure, you have the time to proofread what you say, and make sure it come off as being sincere. But with texts, you don’t have the instant gratification of knowing how the other person is responding and that can make things pretty tricky.

For example, if you came off too strong or were awkward in your delivery in person, your date’s body language would tell you everything you need to know about how your message was received. On texting, you may keep going with a stream of text messages, never knowing that the person you’re talking to is totally turned off. 

That’s why it’s important to brush up on your texting etiquette. Since it’s 2019, the majority of our communication is done through our phones. You’ll want to make sure your flirty texts are coming across the right way, to make sure you don’t accidentally screw up a great potential connection.

Here are nine flirty text mistakes you’ll want to avoid.

Sexual emojis.
Seriously. If you’re in high school, that’s another story. But if you’re an actual adult who’s looking for someone longterm, it’s a sad story to tell your future kids that you won them over with an eggplant emoji. It may seem harmless enough, but try using your words to express yourself as much as possible.

Save the intimate photos for later.
It’s also dangerous to send any sort of intimate photo, especially when not prompted to do so. In general, ladies aren’t impressed over dick pics. Most of them get deleted or laughed at, and that’s not due to size, but rather the fact that it’s incredibly inappropriate. Random dick pics are like the online equivalent to being flashed. Even if you’re proud of what you’ve got, maybe wait a little until you know how your partner feels about them first.

Remember, anyone can read what you wrote.
Texting may seem private, and it usually is. But all it takes is for your partner to leave their phone in an open space for everyone to read what you’ve written. If you’re telling them personal details, just be prepared for their roommate and best friend to also know what you’ve said. .

Keep an eye on the time.
Save any sort of sexting until they’re at home. If it’s 3:00 p.m. and they’re at work, they have the potential of embarrassing themselves unintentionally due to your steamy texts. You always want to be mindful of their schedule, even if yours doesn’t completely match up. And on the topic of time, just know that any text after 1:30 a.m. might read as if you’ve had one too many glasses of wine and are feeling a little lonely. No response back means that they’re probably asleep.

Don’t ignore what they’re saying.
One of the hottest things is having someone ask questions and listen to responses, and not just respond with a blank “lol” or a “cool.” The best kind of flirting is when you’re interested in more than just their photos—ask them how their day has been, and tell them how you wish you could have seen them today. React to what they say and let them you they have your full attention.

Don’t push them too far.
Even if you’ve been intimate with this person before, sometimes people aren’t in the mood to be flirty—even through text. If they’ve had a stressful day, or just need some alone time, you should honor that and not try to make it all about you. Always respect their boundaries, and don’t think that one bad day means they’ve met someone else.

Don’t lead them on.
If you’re texting an acquaintance and things get a little flirty, tone it down if you really want nothing to do with them. You shouldn’t flirt with people out of boredom, since real emotion is involved. If you’re flirting as a way to boost your own self-esteem, just know that theirs is going to come crashing down when they realize you’re not really into them.

Try not to send a text without proofreading it first.
By now, everyone can expect an autocorrect mistake or two. But when you’re flirty texting someone you like, one error can really screw up the flow of conversation. Before you hit send, make sure to glance over what you typed to make sure it’s accurate.

Don’t get other people involved.
If you’re not much of a romantic, try hard not to ask your friend what to type to the person you like. If you do, you’re literally starting your relationship out on a lie. Not everyone is good with words. If you wow your crush with texts that aren’t actually yours, they’ll be pretty disappointed when you’re left to your own devices.

You may feel a bit more empowered by approaching your crush on text, but just remember that mistakes may happen. Even though you’re behind a screen, try to be the same individual you are in person. That way, your crush will know that your flirty texts are a genuine step forward in your relationship.

Karen Belz

Freelance Writer

Karen Belz has written for sites like Bustle, PreviouslyTV, Heavy, and HelloGiggles. She’s also the founder of Best Recap Ever, a site that’s focused on television news and reviews. She’s a fan of sketch comedy shows and most movies that involve Muppets, and has been addicted to Sugar Free Red Bull since 2005.

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